Burnt Pizza

Crummy Photo Skills Strike Again!

2012-01-21T20:26:00.000-08:00

This was in the bakery department at Albertsons. It looked really cheesy and tempting, but I resisted spending the 49 cents. I am so proud!

But what is it? I can't make out the second word!

TP And Plenty Of It!

2012-01-11T16:38:00.000-08:00

I like me a well-stocked bathroom!

Just what IS that Sun Magic cleaner stuff, anyway?

Thanks for visiting!

Breakfast

2011-10-28T16:12:00.000-07:00

It's what's for breakfast!

Oh, it's gone!

Lunch

2011-10-13T16:31:00.000-07:00

Potato! It's what's for lunch!

Yes, there is a potato down there somewhere!

What's For Dinner?

2011-08-29T20:15:00.000-07:00

Chicken tenders fried in chocolate sauce.

Someone grabbed the wrong bottle.

Tastes weird.

Spam I Get

2011-07-27T19:38:00.000-07:00

I got an email today. It was VERY scary, especially as I am reading a thriller in which the FBI plays a big part.

Re: You Have Only 48hours...F.B.I Alert.

FROM: FBI Washington, D.C.

TO: Redacted
DATE: Tuesday, July 26, 2011 4:07 PM

You need to do everything possible within today and tomorrow. Read attached for full detail.

Attachments
Download All
2011-Alert.html

Oh, no, I don't think I'm going to download that.

Glasses

2011-07-15T12:27:00.000-07:00

Went to the eye doctor the other day. Good news: no new problems. Bad news: Two-year restriction on new frames isn't up until August 1st, two weeks from then. Insurance co. (VSP) won't approve an exception, even though I've saved them several hundred dollars, I'm sure, by not going to the eye doctor last year. Thank you so much, VSP!

Rotten Patrons

2011-03-18T19:16:00.000-07:00

I guess some people think that candy bars are recyclable.

Then there are those miscreants that just leave their garbage on the shelves. I found three of these stuffed behind or between the books the other week, but this one appeared today after a massive number of patrons stormed the shelves to check out books. And by massive, I mean ninety books checked out! Yea for that, anyway!

I love the Made/Ready/Discard date/times, it makes it easy to tell how long it has been sitting on the shelf!

Uhhh, I guess the pictures are too wide, I guess you will have to scroll to see the rest of the images. Sorry about that!

Yet Another Scam

2011-01-26T16:39:00.000-08:00

Got a CASHIER'S CHECK for $1,271.02 (TWO CENTS!) in the mail today from STAR Marketing in Los Alamitos. A legitimate company, according to the web site I Googled. I had to Google it because there was no URL on the letter.

It says I've been selected as a NEW CANDIDATE to be a Mystery Shopper! Uh huh.

It says (I have to call them for details, of course. It's a 760 area code in SoCal.) I get to evaluate Western Union by sending $945.00 to someone. I get to keep $200.00! Wow! All that money for so little work! What a deal!

I Googled the phone number (with the word 'scam') and I find the SAME phone number used for a scam in Poway (California) with a DIFFERENT company. Interesting.

Oh, and the letter has a Canadian stamp on it.

So many clues that it is a TOTAL SCAM, as if anyone had a doubt!

I hope STAR Marketing put a disclaimer on their website that they have nothing to do with this scam. It can not be good for their business to be linked to dishonesty by these scammers.

They (the scammers) sure did a good job on the letter and check, though.

A New Scam

2010-09-26T16:20:00.000-07:00

Yay, I won the Department Of State Immigration Lottery. Yes, there IS a lottery, for visas, but I don't think they pay your airplane ticket nor give you a hundred-thousand dollars.

Plus, I'm already here!

U.S. Department of State

From:
immigrations

To:
Public Communication Division, PA/PL
U.S. Department of State
Washington, D.C. 20520
www.dvlottery.state.gov

Congratulations!!!

You are among those randomly selected and registered for further consideration in the (DV) DIVERSITY IMMIGRANT PROGRAM for the fiscal Year 2010. This official U.S. government program aims to diversify the United States population by creating an immigration opportunity for under-represented groups. Properly completed entries are entered into a computer-generated lottery and winners are randomly selected.Winners and their family members are able to live, work, and study in the United States!

Your visa winning/case numbers identity is 2010AF00J051PXXX and the serial net visa passport attached to your case number is SNVPh700IU. Your visa type permits you to travel with your family and Your visa duration is 10 years multiple entry to the United States. It is renewable upon expiration and it permits you to work, study and own properties in the United States.

Your selection as a winner entitles you to $100,000 (One Hundred Thousand Dollars) which will be made available to you upon your arrival in the United States. The visa gives you an opportunity to apply for and acquire a United States of America citizenship green card while residing in the United States of America.

Thanks
Mahabir Estrella Fernandez

PLEASE CONTACT CONSULAR Jeffrey Kellerman WITH YOUR WINNING CASE NUMBERS AND YOUR VISA PASSPORT SERIAL NUMBERS. HE WILL HANDLE YOUR VISA DOCUMENTATIONS, ALSO GUIDE AND PUT YOU THROUGH YOUR VISA AND FLIGHT TICKET DOCUMENTS PROCESSING. HIS CONTACT DETAILS ARE LISTED BELOW.

Name: Jeffrey Kellerman
Email: us_consular@mail2usa.com
Office Phone: +447035986005
Alternate: +447011130080

DISCLAIMER :

This e-mail is for the intended recipient only If you have received it by mistake please let us know by reply and then delete it from your system,access, disclosure, copying, distribution or reliance on any of it by anyone else is prohibited.

If you as intended recipient have received this e-mail incorrectly, please notify the sender (via e-mail) Immediately.

So Much For That

2010-08-19T13:31:00.000-07:00

After finishing So Much For That, by Lionel Shriver, a most excellent book, I have quite decided I will never have chemotherapy, and maybe not even surgery, if I have a re-occurrence of something awful. (Don't click that second link, do do the first, I am just being silly there.)

Scam Relief!

2010-07-09T19:30:00.000-07:00

Well, I guess I can finally get that compensation for all those scams!

From a fellow scammed victim...
From:Elizabeth Park Fowler fowlerelizaa22@aol.com

I'm Ms. Elizabeth Park Fowler of Tampa, FL 33629., I'm a US citizen, I'm 51yrs Old. And I strongly and meant to believed that you are a foreigner I suppose, I'm one of those that took part in the Compensation in Nigeria, London, Malaysia and Spain two year's ago. I was even contacted through email by an individual claiming to be my country (FBI) and they told me that they will help me too and they too sucks me dry by me sending them money to help retrieved my money and me having a new and better life and they all refused to pay me, I had paid over $91,320 while in the US my husband and family had to leave me because I refused to listen to them when they are telling me to stop, trying to get my payment all to no avail.

So I decided to travel down to Nigeria with all my compensation documents, and I was directed to meet Barrister George K. C. Esq, who is the member of COMPENSATION AWARD AUTHORITY and a Human Rights Activist (Lawyer), and I contacted him and he explained everything to me. He said whoever is contacting us through emails are fake and that they are all working together as different gangs and partners. It all started with one man Barrister Frank Okoh who contacted me to help him and since then my life was hell till now.

All the above name and many more were listed to me and showed to me by Barrister George K. C., because I was scammed by Mark Welling, Barrister Frank Okoh & James Obi. But I was disappointed when I went to my country FBI face to face to seek that I have been paying money to them. And they was very annoyed with me because they say that I am going above the law by dealing with people that are claiming to be them, I was heart broken and ashamed of my own self all of that i lost my hard earn money and my entire family at that. That’s when I took the mind and spirit to go down to Nigeria when it all began?

There are still real transactions in the world globe today but the scammers are just much than the real transaction so we are all confused so is better you gets the compensation money instead of pursuing empty dreams. When I went to the U.S.A embassy I was directed to Barrister George K. C. Esq of London immediately, He took me to the paying bank for the claim of my Compensation payment and he showed me care and help me when I first approached him I was very annoyed with all black's at that time. Right now I'm the happiest woman on earth because I have received my compensation funds amounting to $970,000.00. Moreover, Barrister George K. C., showed me the full information of those that are yet to receive their payments and I saw your email and name as one of the scam victims, that is why I decided to email you to stop dealing with those people, they are not with your fund, they are only making money out of you. I will advise you to contact Barrister George K. C. in London.

You have to contact him directly on this information below.

COMPENSATION AWARD AUTHORITY
Name: Barrister George K. C. (Legal Practitioner and Consultant)
Cell Number: +44 762 419 9026
Email: gkchi@sify.com

You really have to stop dealing with those people that are contacting you and telling you that your fund is with them, it is not in anyway with them, they are only taking advantage of you and they will dry you up until you have nothing. The only money I paid after I met Barrister George K. C. was just $1,325.00, so you have to take note of that. Don't worry at all as you do not need to go down to his country Nigeria all he need's from you is for you to identify yourself briefly and he will take it from there. I am traveling to Mexico to find my family now and start a new and better life but I had to do some good before I take my live as I will not be coming to the computer for long again till I see my family and start a new and better life. Once again my brother and friend do not waste your time and money on those empty promises. Instead, go ahead and contact Barrister George K. C. immediately you can call him if you like.

Thank You and Be Blessed.
Ms. Elizabeth Park Fowler (Elizabeth)
Trustee/Treasurer, Triad Foundation Inc.
1902 South Wykagyl Street
Tampa, FL USA. 33629
Education: BS, Business Administration.

Dinner

2009-11-08T10:30:00.000-08:00

Charred hamburger and boiled spinach...dinner last night.

Try to make a poem out of THAT!

Gross Copyright Violation

2009-11-03T18:02:00.000-08:00

I was at the dentist the other month. I was reading Sunset magazine (December 2008) and drooling over the recipes.

I was hoping to share them with YOU, and so I found the pictures and recipes on MyRecipes.

This is Thai Chicken Coconut Soup. Does it not look yummy? I believe I have had something like this at Karinya. Only 7.2 grams of carbohydrates. I'll have TWO ~~bowels~~ bowls!

For dessert, let us have some Eggnog Cheesecake! Only 27 grams of carbs, so maybe I could have just a smidgen.

Or how about some Cranberry Obsession Snow Cake? It is red, it is white, it has white chocolate shavings on top! And only 113 grams of carbohydrates per serving!

Someone sent me this. I don't know if it is serendipitous spam, or from a (regretfully) forgotten relative. I hope the former. But, it's probably the latter.

But, I thought it was pretty good, so here it is, in the original size:

jakara bullard 10-14-09

pizza poem

o,pizza cheese hanging from the crust.
you make me fell like im in haven with your hot pepperonis.and tamato sauce. why are you so good chessy pizza.maybe i will get another slice to the ride to marie's.pizza pizza day and nite i cant stop.

I feel the same, pizza rules!

I Get E-Mail!

2009-06-02T20:52:00.000-07:00

Two for today! Why the all caps? Supposed to look like a telegram?

From: "EU INTERNATIONAL LOTTO AND GAMING CORPORATION"
Reply-To: cpobv@aim.com
Subject: WINNING NUMBER: EU/ILO-564/003/666
Date: Tue, 2 Jun 2009 11:19:21 +0200

EU INTERNATIONAL LOTTO AND GAMING CORPORATION.
LAAN VAN HOORNWIJCK 55
2289 DG RIJSWIJK
THE NETHERLANDS
www.lotto.nl

MONTH OF MAY EU INTERNATIONAL LOTTO.
WINNING NUMBER: EU/ILO-564/003/666

OUR DEAR WINNER,

THIS IS TO NOTIFY YOU THAT YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS HAS WON YOU THE SUM OF (ONE MILLION EURO) FROM EU INTERNATIONAL LOTTO ONLINE AND GAMING CORPORATION, ALL THE E-MAIL ADDRESSES WERE SELECTED FROM A DATA BASE OF INTERNET E-MAIL USERS, FROM WHICH YOUR E-MAIL ADDRESS CAME OUT AS THE WINNING COUPON.

WE THEREBY CONTACT YOU TO CLAIM YOUR WINNING AMOUNT QUICKLY AS THIS IS A MONTHLY LOTTERY. FAILURE TO CLAIM YOUR WIN WILL RESULT INTO THE REVERSION OF THE WINNING SUM TO OUR FOLLOWING MONTH LOTTERY. (EXPIRATION DATE 19TH OF JUNE). PLEASE CONTACT OUR APPROVED AGENT FOR YOUR REGION WITH YOUR WINNING NUMBER ABOVE.

EU INTERNATIONAL LOTTO ONLINE AGENCY.
MISS. GILLIAN ROWLAND.
DIRECTOR OF WINNING CLAIMS DEPARTMENT.
TEL: 31- 630-800-322
E-MAIL: cpobv@aim.com

KINDLY KEEP YOUR WINNING PRIZE TO YOURSELF, TO AVOID DOUBLE CLAIM OF YOUR WINNING PRIZE.

REGARDS,
MRS. EVA JOHNSON.
DIRECTOR OF EU INTERNATIONAL LOTTO ONLINE.

WELL, I GUESS IT'S TOO LATE TO KINDLY KEEP MY WINNING PRIZE TO MYSELF, EVA! SO SORRY!!

And now...ALLUVIAL GOLD!

Reply-To:
From: mrs cemira gowan
Subject: From Mrs. Cemira,
Date: Tue, 2 Jun 2009 08:16:21 +0000

From Mrs. Cemira,
It's with pleasure that I write to inform you of the availability of ALLUVIAL GOLD for sale. Though my late husband was into this small scale mining business before his untimely death (may his soul rest in a perfect peace) Below are the classification of the goods :

PRODUCT : ALLUVIAL GOLD.
QUANTITY :500 KGS.
QUALITY : 22+ KARATS. Karat IS purity. 22 Karat gold is 91.671 pure.
PURITY : 99.98%
PRICE : $ 17,500usd PER KG.
TERM OF PAYMENT : NEGOTIABLE.

We do not accept advance payment, the transaction will be done according to the seller and buyers agreement and we expect you to come with your Inspector machines and after checking, the payment will be on bank to bank bases. All your base are belong...Sorry!
But be informed that the buyer will be responsible for the shipments arrangement of the goods to his refineries, which will be deducted from our money after the sales of the goods at your refineries

I don’t want to waste much time again because the proceeds from this gold is highly needed in order to uplift our mining strength and since the raining seasons we have not been able to do anything due to the lack of the mining equipment. We would also asked that you help us after the sales to use the part of the money realised to procure the needed equipments for us .
If you are interested in the above product please get in touch with me and we will make arrangement on the mode of delivery.

I await to hear from you very soon.

Regards.
Mrs. Cemira Gowan

And what the heck would I DO with alluvial gold, anyway?

Did/Not Did

2009-05-31T20:05:00.000-07:00

I filled up the vehicle with gas and put a hundred miles on it today... a drive to the east. I have never done that before, in my entire life. I also put new windshield wipers on.

The Border Patrol checkpoint on the 8 has a big board listing their achievements at that station.

I drove a Lake Murray guy to Big Lots so he could buy some jumper cables, then I gave him a jump.

Observations:

The library in La Mesa doesn't open till one on Sunday.
There are a lot of helpful employees at Home Depot.
Guys in full kit riding a bicycle with safety brake levers just look silly.
It was fairly sunny in the east, but very overcast in the west.
Assuming I had the skills, which I don't, if I had to write for a living in this house, I'd go MAD!
Sisal rope is more dear than one would think.
Pete Dexter has a unique public speaking manner. And he write good!
Not everyone is aware that batteries generate hydrogen gas. Think Hindenburg!

Pictures I Want To Take:

The foreign car repair place over by Home Depot.
The interesting old truck on Normal.
Antennas on house near freeway on Los Coches Road.
Lady do leg stretches at lake after walking, while talking on cell phone.

I Get E-Mail!

2009-04-15T17:57:00.000-07:00

It's ok, the FBI is on the job, and given me their approval to send six hundred bucks to this fellow in Nigeria, as this is definitely not a scam or terrorist plot. Wow, what excellent news, I could really use this money!

FROM: "washington.fieldic.fbi.gov"
SUBJECT: FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION FBI.WASHINGTON DC

Anti-Terrorist And Monetary Crimes Division
FBI Headquarters In Washington, D.C.
Federal Bureau Of Investigation
J. Edgar Hoover Building

935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW Washington, D.C. 20535-0001

Attn: Beneficiary,

This is to officially inform you that it has come to our notice and we have
thoroughly completed an Investigation with the help of our Intelligence
Monitoring Network System that you legally won the sum of $800,000.00 USD from a
Lottery Company outside the United States of America. During our investigation
we discovered that your e-mail won the money from an Online Balloting System and
we have authorized this winning to be paid to you via a Certified Cashier's
Check.

Normally, it will take up to 10 business days for an International Check to be
cashed by your local bank. We have successfully notified this company on your
behalf that funds are to be drawn from a registered bank within the United
States of America so as to enable you cash the check instantly without any
delay, henceforth the stated amount of $800,000.00 USD has been deposited with
Bank of America.

We have completed this investigation and you are hereby approved to receive the
winning prize as we have verified the entire transaction to be Safe and 100%
risk free, due to the fact that the funds have been deposited at Bank Of America
you will be required to settle the following bills directly to the Lottery Agent
in-charge of this transaction whom is located in Lagos, Nigeria. According to
our discoveries, you were required to pay for the following -

(1) Deposit Fee's ( Fee's paid by the company for the deposit into an
American Bank which is - Bank Of America )
(2) Cashier's Check Conversion Fee ( Fee for converting the Wire Transfer
payment into a Certified Cashier's Check )
(3) Shipping Fee's ( This is the charge for shipping the Cashier's
Check to your home address and this fee includes Insurance )

The total amount for everything is $600.00 (Six Hundred-US Dollars). We have
tried our possible best to indicate that this $600.00 should be deducted from
your winning prize but we found out that the funds have already been deposited
at Bank Of America and cannot be accessed by anyone apart from you the winner,
therefore you will be required to pay the required fee's to the Agent
in-charge of this transaction via Western Union Money Transfer Or Money Gram.

In order to proceed with this transaction, you will be required to contact the
agent in-charge (MR. SILAS OKORO) via e-mail. Kindly look below to find
appropriate contact information:

CONTACT AGENT NAME: MR. SILAS OKORO

E-MAIL ADDRESS: silasokoroincplc@gmail.com

Telephone Number: +234-803-862-0836

You will be required to e-mail him with the following information:

FULL NAME:
ADDRESS:
CITY:
STATE:
ZIP CODE:
DIRECT CONTACT NUMBER:

You will also be required to request Western Union or Money Gram details on how
to send the required $600.00 in order to immediately ship your prize of
$800,000.00 USD via Certified Cashier's Check drawn from Bank Of America,
also include the following transaction code in order for him to immediately
identify this transaction: EA2948-910.

This letter will serve as proof that the Federal Bureau Of Investigation is
authorizing you to pay the required $600.00 ONLY to MR. SILAS OKORO via
information in which he shall send to you, if you do not receive your winning
prize of $800,000..00 we shall be held responsible for the loss and this shall
invite a penalty of $3,000 which will be made PAYABLE ONLY to you (The Winner).

Mr. Edward John

Special Agent.
Washington DC FBI.

Room, 7367
J. Edgar Hoover Building

935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW

Washington, D.C. 20535-0001

NOTE: In order to ensure your check gets delivered to you ASAP, you are advised
to immediately contact Mr.Silas Okoro via contact information provided above
and make the required payment of $600.00 to information in which he shall
provide to you

I Get E-Mail!

2009-04-12T19:48:00.000-07:00

I got this nifty communique from FBI headquarters, I'm sure, the other day. Other than hitting "Reply To", I have no clue how I am to contact these folks. Nor do I have any idea what they want! All I know is they are threatening me. ME!

The ALL CAPS gives me a headache, but then it changes to something normal. But not without the mispelings! One would think the college graduates at the FBI would know how to operate spell chezh!

FROM:"Robert S. Mueller, III" SUBJECT: FBI HEADQUARTERS IN WASHINGTON, D.C.

ANTI-TERRORIST AND MONITARY CRIMES DIVISION

FBI HEADQUARTERS IN WASHINGTON, D.C.

FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION

J. EDGAR HOOVER BUILDING

935 PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE, NW WASHINGTON, D.C. 20535-0001

Website: www.fbi.gov

http://www.fbi.gov/majcases/fraud/fraudschemes.htm

ATTENTION FUND BENEFICIARY,

THIS IS AN OFFICIAL ADVICE FROM THE FBI FOREIGN

REMITTANCE/TELEGRAPHIC DEPT.,

IT HAS COME TO OUR NOTICE THAT THE C.B.N BANK NIGERIA DISTRICT HAS

RELEASED 10,500,000.00 U.S DOLLARS INTO BANK OF AMERICA IN YOUR NAME AS THE

BENEFICIARY,BY INHERITANCE MEANS.

THE C.B.N BANK NIGERIA KNOWING FULLY WELL THAT THEY DO NOT HAVE

ENOUGH FACILITIES TO EFFECT THIS PAYMENT FROM THE UNITED KINGDOM TO YOUR

ACCOUNT, USED WHAT WE KNOW AS A SECRET DIPLOMATIC TRANSIT PAYMENT S.T.D.P TO PAY THIS

FUND THROUGH WIRE TRANSFER,THEY USED THIS MEANS TO COMPLETE THE PAYMENT.

THEY ARE STILL, WAITING FOR CONFIRMATION FROM YOU ON THE ALREADY

TRANSFERRED FUNDS WHICH WAS MADE IN DIRECT TRANSFER SO THAT THEY CAN DO FINAL CREDITING TO YOUR ACCOUNT. SECRET DIPLOMATIC PAYMENTS ARE NOT MADE UNLESS THE FUNDS ARE RELATED TO TERRORIST ACTIVITIES WHY MUST YOUR PAYMENT BE MADE IN SECRET TRANSFER , IF YOUR TRANSACTION IS LEGITIMATE,IF YOU ARE NOT A TERRORIST, THEN WHY DID YOU NOT RECEIVE THE MONEY DIRECTLY INTO YOUR ACCOUNT,THIS IS A PURE CODED ,MEANS OF PAYMENT?

RECORDS WHICH WE HAVE HAD WITH THIS METHOD OF PAYMENT IN THE PAST

HAS ALWAYS BEEN RELATED TO TERRORIST ACTS, WE DO NOT WANT YOU TO GET INTO

TROUBLE AS SOON AS THESE FUNDS REFLECT IN YOUR ACCOUNT IN THE U.S.A, SO IT IS OUR DUTY AS A WORD WIDE COMMISSION TO CORRECT THIS LITTLE PROBLEM BEFORE THIS FUND WILL BE CREDITED INTO YOUR PERSONAL ACCOUNT.

DUE TO THE INCREASED DIFFICULTY AND UNNECESSARY SCRUTINY BY THE

AMERICAN AUTHORITIES WHEN FUNDS COME FROM OUTSIDE OF EUROPE, AND THE MIDDLE EAST, THEF.B.I BANK COMMISSION FOR EUROPE HAS STOPPED THE TRANSFER ON ITS WAY TO DELIVER PAYMENT OF $10,500,000.00 TO DEBIT YOUR RESERVE ACCOUNT AND PAY YOU THROUGH A SECURED DIPLOMATIC TRANSIT ACCOUNT (S.D.T.A). WE GOVERN AND OVERSEES FUNDS TRANSFER FOR THE WORLD BANK AND THE REST OF THE WORLD.

WE ADVICE YOU CONTACT US IMMEDIATELY,AS THE FUNDS HAVE BEEN STOPPED AND ARE BEING HELD IN OUR CUSTODY ,UNTIL YOU CAN BE ABLE TO PROVIDE US WITH

A DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY SEAL OF TRANSFER(DIST) WITHING 3 DAYS FROM THE

WORLD LOCAL BANK THAT AUTHORIZE THE TRANSFER FROM WHERE THE FUNDS WAS TRANSFERRED FROM TO CERTIFY THAT THE FUNDS THAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO RECEIVE FROM NIGERIA ARE ANTITERRORIST/DRUG FREE OR WE SHALL HAVE CAUSE TO CROSS AND IMPOUND THE PAYMENT,WE SHALL RELEASE THE FUNDS IMMEEDIATELY WE RECEIVE THIS LEGAL DOCUMENTS .

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We have decided to contact you directly to acquire the proper

verifications and proof from you to show that you are the rightful person to receive this fund, because of the amount involve,we want to make sure is a clean and legal money you are about to receive. Be informed that the fund are now in United State in your name , but right now we have ask the bank not to release the fund to anybody that comes to them , unless we ask them to do so, because we have to carry out our investigations first before releasing the fund to you.

Note that the fund is in the BANK OF AMERICA right now, but we have ask them not to credit the fund to you yet, because we need a solid proof and verifications from you before releasing the funds.

So to this regards you are to re-assure and proof to us that what you are about to receive is a clean money by sending to us FBI Identification Record and also Diplomatic Immunity Seal Of Transfer(DIST) to satisfy to us that the money your about to receive is legitimate and real money. You are to forward the documents to us immediately if you have it in your possession, if you don?t have it let us know so that we will direct and inform you where to obtain the document and send to us so that we will ask the bank holding the funds the Bank Of America to go ahead Crediting your account immediately.

This Documents are to be issued to you from the World Local Bank that Authorized the transfer, so get back to us immediately if you don?t have the document so that we will inform you the particular place to obtain the document in United Kingdom U.K, because we have come to realize that the fund was Authorized by H.S.B.C Bank in London.An FBI Identification Record and Diplomatic Immunity Seal Of Transfer(DIST)often referred to as a Criminal History Record or Rap Sheet, is a listing of certain information taken from fingerprint submissions retained by the FBI in connection with arrests and, in some instances, federal employment, naturalization, or military service.THESE CONDITION IS VALID UNTIL 16TH OF APRIL 2009 AFTER WE SHALL TAKE ACTIONS ON CANCELLING THE PAYMENT AND THEN CHARGE YOU FOR ILLEGALLY MOVING FUNDS OUT OF NIGERIA .

GURANTEE: FUNDS WILL BE RELEASED ON CONFIRMATION OF THE DOCUMENT.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

FINAL INSTRUCTION:

60F CREDIT PAYMENT INSTRUCTION: IRREVOCABLE CREDIT GUARANTEE

61E BENEFICIARY HAS FULL POWER WHEN VALIDATION IS CLEARED

62 BENNEFICIARIES BANK IN U.S.A., CAN ONLY RELEASE FUNDS-

62 UPON CONFIRMATION FROM THE WORLD BANK/UNITED NATIONS.

64 BEARERS MUST CLEAR BANK PROTOCOL AND VALIDATION REQUEST

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

NOTE: We have asked for the above documents to make available the

most complete and up-to date records possible for the enhancement of public safety,welfare and security of Society while recognizing the importance of individual privacy rights.. If you fail to provide the Documents to us, we will charge you with the FBI and take our proper action against you for not proofing to us the legitimate of the fund you are about to receive.

The United States Department of Justice Order 556-73 establishes rules

and regulations for the subject of an FBI Identification Record to obtain

a copy of his or her own Record for review. The FBI Criminal Justice Information Services(CJIS) Division processes these requests to check illegal activities in U.S.A.

An individual may request a copy of his or her own FBI Identification Record for personal review or to challenge information on the Record. Other reasons an individual may request a copy of his or her own Identification Record may include international adoption or to satisfy a requirement to live or work in a foreign country or receive funds from another country (i.e., Diplomatic Immunity Seal Of Transfer, letter of good conduct, criminal history background, etc.)

FBI Director

Robert S. Mueller, III

By the way, I checked the FBI website, they are aware of this little bit of heaven.

You Light Up My Year

2009-04-10T15:48:00.000-07:00

A light-year is a measure of distance, people!

Heinlein made me think about it:

...had all been in that waterproof money belt Janet had given me so many light-years ago;...¹

Did he mean distance? It was in Canada (sort of) that she received the belt, now she just climbed out of the Mississippi river. That's a far distance. Or does did he mean time? Because the phraseology would be consistent with an expression of time. In which case he is wrong. But, hey, it's Heinlein! He knows his stuff! I'm sure he meant distance!

But check this out:

Flash back!! Back to a moment of time so many light years ago.²

That is just not going to cut it. And from a dean at the University of New England, too!

For more information, check out the Light Year article at eSky.

Quote Sources

¹ Heinlein, Robert A. Friday New York: Holt Rinehart Winston, c1982. pg. 174.
² Dean Kelley. "University of New England - COM - RSAS - Newsletter - September 2007 - Page 1". [Online](10April2009). URL: http://www.une.edu/com/rsas/newsletter/sept07a.asp

Granola Bars New Packaging

2009-03-23T16:47:00.000-07:00

I noticed my beloved Albertson's Chewy Granola Bars (Peanut Butter & Chocolate Chip) have been repackaged with an orange wrapper, but I didn't figure out just what that meant till other other day.

They changed the size!

Check this out:

They have been reduced from 10 ounces to .84 ounces!

Let us look at the nutritional data on the back:

You can see the the carbs, sugars, and protein have gone down by one gram each.

How about size?

Take a look:

The new bar looks longer!

But how about thickness?

It looks about the same thickness, but it doesn't look as dense.

As far as cost, I didn't keep track of the old price, so I couldn't tell you.

I hate change.

I Get E-Mail!

2009-02-20T17:26:00.000-08:00

Come on, put a little effort into it! "rgds"???

SUBJECT: claim info
FROM: "email.award09@alice.it"

rgds,

Your email ID has been awarded 1million EUR,Reply to: micro.alliance@i12.com
+31-647-269-378

Alice Messenger ;-) chatti anche con gli amici di Windows Live Messenger e tutti i telefonini TIM!

I Get E-Mail!

2009-02-07T10:01:00.000-08:00

I get another offer to do something illegal, this time from Malaysia. PROTIP: If you are sending out email scams, try to have the sender's name match the sending email address.

Greeting To You My Good Friend
Jason Koh

Dear Friend, [The first portent (Well, really, the second, eh?), I HAVE no friends! (Actually, I do, but it is something I have affected in order create a sympathetic persona. But I digress...]

Compliments of the season and my best wishes to you, I apologize if the contents here under are contrary to your moral ethics, but please treat with absolute secrecy and personal.

My name is Mr. Jason Koh, I'm a Singaporean and a seasoned Banker with Malaysia HSBC Bank (Malaysia office), am as well an account officer to a deceased customer of our bank, we lost this customer in the tsunami disaster on the 26th December 2004 in Sumatra Indonesia. http://asc-india.org/lib/20041226-sumatra.htm and his account of US$19.761 million with us have been unclaimed due to unavailability of next of kin/relatives to claim his estate.

In accordance with the escheat laws ["Es cheat", indeed!] in Malaysia as a kingdom, the board of directors of the bank met forth night ago and resolved to turn the estate of the deceased over to Government having waited for too long without the deceased relatives/next of kin surfacing property and if this is done, invariably, the funds will end up to become Government property and it is as a result of this that [I] am moved to contact you considering the fact that you share almost the same name with the deceased. And what name would that be, eh?

In view of this, I am seeking your cooperation and understanding to stand as the deceased next of kin to enable us claim the inheritance before the period given by the bank elapse. If you are interested and in agreement with me, get back to me quickly and I will send to you all our bank contacts and the information you may need to proceed without coming to Malaysia, and be rest assured that it is risk free project and the proceedings will be shared 50% each once the fund are repatriated into your account anywhere in the world. I will not settle for less that 53 percent, sir!

Please reply immediately with your information including your telephone number for easy communication and oral discussion.

I await your prompt response immediately.

Best Regards.

Jason koh. And capitalize your last name, Jason! Be proud! You are a person!

I Get E-Mail!

2009-01-28T19:42:00.000-08:00

Boy, I thought this was the REAL THING!

Dear Customer!

We have been waiting for you to contact us for your Confirmed Package That
is registered with us for shipping to your residential location. We had
thought that your sender gave you our contact
Details. It may interest you to know that a letter is also added to Your
package. However, we cannot quote its content to you via email for Privacy
reasons.

We understand that the content of your package itself is a Bank Draft
Worth of $800,000.00 USD, FedEx do not ship money in CASH or in CHEQUES
but Bank Drafts are shippable. The package is registered with us for
mailing and still in our possession, and it is ready for delivery to your
door step.

Meanwhile, before the delivery or shipment will take place, you are advice
to send to us the following data mention below: We are sending you this
email because your package is been registered on a Special Order.

What you have to do now, is to contact our Delivery Department for
Immediate dispatch of your package to your residential address. Note
That as soon as our Delivery Team confirm your information, it will Take
only one working day (24 hours) for your package to arrive it's
Designated destination. For your information, the VAT & Shipping Charges
as well as Insurance fees have been paid for by your Colleague before your
package was registered. Note that the payment
That is made on the Insurance, Premium & Clearance Certificates, are to
certify that the Bank Draft is not a Drug Affiliated Fund (DAF)
Neither is it funds to sponsor Terrorism in your country. This will help
you avoid any form of query from the Monetary Authority of your
Country.

However, you will have to pay the sum of $210USD to the FedEx Delivery
Department being full payment for the Security Keeping Fee of the
FedEx company as stated in our privacy terms & condition page. Also be
informed that your colleague wished to pay for the Security Keeping
fee, but we do not accept such payment considering the facts that all
items & package that are registered with us have a time limitation and
we cannot accept payment not knowing when you will be contacting us for
your package or even responding to us. So we cannot take the risk
to have accepted such payment in case of any possible demurrage.

Kindly note that your colleague did not leave us with any further
Information. We hope that you respond to us as soon as possible because
if you fail to respond until the expiry date of your package, we may Refer
the package to the British Commission for Welfare as the package
Do not have a return address.

Kindly contact the delivery department (FedEx Delivery Post) with the
Details given below:

FedEx Online Delivery Post
Contact Person: KELLY MORGAN OSAGIE
Dispatch@terrapins.com

Kindly complete the below form and send it to the email address given
above. This is mandatory to reconfirm your Postal address and telephone
Numbers.

FULL NAMES:
TELEPHONE:
POSTAL ADDRESS:
CITY:
STATE:
COUNTRY:

As soon as your details are received, our delivery team will give you the
necessary payment procedure so that you can effect the payment for the
Security Keeping Fee. As soon as they confirm your payment Receipt
of$210USD, they will not hesitate to dispatch your package as well as the
attached letter to your residence. It usually takes 24 hours being an
overnight delivery service.

Note that we were not instructed to email you, but due to the high
Priority of your package we had to inform you as your sender did not
Leave us with his phone number because he stated that he just arrived
Nigeria and he hasn’t fix his phone yet. We indeed personally sealed
Your Bank Draft and we found your email contact in the receivers Column as
the recipient of the foremost package.

Ensure to contact the delivery department with the email address given
above and ensure to fill the above form as well to enable a successful
Reconfirmation.

Yours Faithfully,
Mrs. Margaret Blaire.
FedEx Online Team Management.
All rights reserved. © 1995-2009
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This E-mail is only for the above addresses. It may contain Confidential
or Privileged information. If you are not an addressee
you must not copy, distribute, disclose or use any of the information in
it or any attachments.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
FEDEX INTL>>>LICENCE OF FEDERAL EXPRESS CORPERATION.

But then, something looks funny about the spelling of that last word... Looks like a combination of "cooperation" and "corporation"!

The Big Trip -- Day Two Redux

2009-01-26T20:19:00.000-08:00

We wandered around Seaside looking at stuff like the cemetery, houses I once lived in, schools, and places I frequented in a former life.

I remember this old building as a grocery store when I was little, now it's a "Super Mercado"!

We went over to the Dennis the Menace Park and looked around. It's pretty neat, but all the old play equipment that I remember is long gone. I can't even find any pictures on the web, but one old postcard. Sad. The locomotive is still there, happily!

The ducks are still at the duck pond. But they seem larger, somehow...

We then headed out to Point Pinos to look at the lighthouse and the sunset, along with everyone else in Monterey who wasn't otherwise occupied.

The sign is for the seismic monitoring station. I have focusing issues...

I was getting hungry, so we started looking for some place to eat. Cannery row seemed a bit crowded and touristy, so we headed downtown. We walked around downtown, and of all the exotic eateries we COULD have gone to, we ended up at Roundtable Pizza! Hey, it was good, and it had a very cool mural on the wall.

After stuffing ourselves we walked over to Fisherman's Wharf. It was pretty busy for a Sunday evening, but not TOO busy. We took some pictures of some rowboats in the dark.

A tripod might have useful here!

We had a time figuring out which building was ye olde customs house, then a bit of disagreement as to whether what I said was a bocci bowling was indeed that. But it turns out that it is. We then decided we needed some more beer. Or one of us did. We found a brewery, not sure of the name, but we are thinking it was possibly Peter B's Brewery & Restauant(enough qualifiers there?). It was pretty noisy, what with the half-dozen television screens, assorted colligiate-types, and a football game on. We sat outside where it was quiet and watch a couple guys playing chess. We drank some kind of Russian Stout Dark stuff. It was pretty stout!

We spent about a hour there, watching folks come and go, then decided we better find some place to stay for the night, so we headed off to motel row to find the waffle motel, better know as Comfort Inn.

The Big Trio -- Day Two

2009-01-25T19:10:00.000-08:00

Across the tracks from the Comfort Inn in Hanford is the Lacey Milling Company. It looks very old and industrialy and interesting, so I took a bunch of photos of it. I shall only inflict a couple on you here, you can go look at the rest on the Zooomr page.

Someone could turn this into a nice model railroad industry!

I also made a little movie of some locomotives going past.

Notice the flashing lights on the police car at the end. Yes, The Man pulled someone over on a Sunday morning. I walked back to the hotel and had another pastry and coffee. Then we left for Monterey.

Road Rage, With Garlic

2009-01-22T19:20:00.000-08:00

While passing through Gilroy (the Garlic Capital Of The World, don't cha know!) on Sunday we observed a road rage incident right in front of us!

A white truck passed us, then a bit later a white car zoomed up and stopped in front of him and a guy got out and started yelling, then another car came up and a woman got out, too.

This guy was easing his way out, as were we!! Hey, how come the white car has no front license plate, eh?

DISCLAIMER: All of my recollections of this incident are hazy, and as such I am a terrible witness. Maybe there wasn't any yelling. Maybe they wuz just asking directions. Don't quote me on nuthin'!!!

Food Of The Gods

2009-01-21T19:08:00.000-08:00

One nice thing about Solvang is that you will never go hungry there, as long as you have enough lucre.

Back in the 60s we stopped for lunch and I had a big bowl of sauerkraut. It was great!

On the Big Trip we stopped there for dessert. The first thing we saw was a stork. Storks are good luck! With any luck we would find a bakery soon!

We walked around a bit, found the Big Shoe as seen on Huell Hower's television program.

That little girl walking away said, "Mommy, I don't fit in the shoe anymore!"

We wandered around a bit more until we found the Solvang Bakery. What a fabulous place! We each got a pastry.

I got the eclair, Matt got the cherry-powdered sugar thing. I just KNEW that was going to be a mess!

We walked around a bit more until we found a little park to sit in and consume our goodies!

That powdered sugar WAS messy!

Hans Christian Andersen had to avert his gaze...

I did NOT test my blood sugar after this debacle!

I just do not want to know...

On The Road

2009-01-20T22:45:00.000-08:00

One of the places we ate at was the Taco Temple in Morro Bay.

It's not your usual taco stand. There was a bit of a line, we had to wait about fifteen minutes to get a table.

I had the tacquito carnitas plate, with a diet Coke.

It was different, but pretty good. Not a lot of cheese. None, in fact. I love cheese. There was a red salsa on the side that hadn't arrived yet.

I forget what Matt had, but this is it. It was also carnitas, and there are a couple of tortillas down there somewhere.

It took him a while to eat it. I thought about ordering some nachos while I waited, but I was a good boy and did not. Good thing, too, as we ended up eating some baked goods in Solvang later on...

They serve beer and wine, too, as you can see.

A woman near us was sitting alone, pecking away on her personal electronic device. She had a bottle of wine and chips with salsa along with her meal. I was rather envious, I would never go out and eat alone. It all seemed very European.

I ran across a bad review of the place, they didn't like the food or the service. I found the waitress a little brusque, but in a sort of humorous way. She teased us about not ordering more food, probably because we are the big lads that we are. I heard the fish is excellent here, but I'm not a fish person. If I wanted typical taco stand Mexican food I would go elsewhere. The owners here are going for something different, and I think they've done a good job. I also found the decor nice, and even though it was busy, it wasn't noisy.

Break Time

2008-12-09T18:48:00.000-08:00

Baklava, it's what's for break!

I Get E-Mail!

2008-11-30T09:15:00.000-08:00

Another one. Senator Mr. Jerry wants me to show up in South Carolina to get my money, the amount of which is not specified. Not that I would ever go to South Carolina, nice as it might be, as I don't travel well. Heck, I couldn't bestir myself to travel across the street for a hundred bucks, I am just THAT slack!

From: "Senator Jerry Gana"
Subject: Final Settlement of Your Payment.
Date: Sat, 29 Nov 2008 11:21:14 -0800

Dear Contractor,

Following the meeting held with the Presidency on the issue of foreign contract payments, a consensus was reached with the Presidency about the activities of some officials of the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) who are in the habit of diverting contractors payment and frustrating them by imposing unnecessary charges on them, making it difficult for these contractors to receive their long overdue payments. All the above allegations levelled against CBN consequently compelled the Presidency to stop the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) from further managing contractors payment.

This development has been reported to the Presidency, who expressed his dissatisfaction over these actions as those were ment to tarnish the image of our beloved country. The Presidency has therefore given instruction that all foreign contractors should henceforth, stop going through the CBN officials to pursue their contract claim. Any contractor going through the CBN is doing that at his or her own risk.

The Presidency after an in-depth and pain staking study of your financial and psychological predicament in receiving your fund in the last few years, hereby this day resolved that an immediate and unconditional payment release be effected to you via our Payment Centre in South Carolina, U.S.A.

This decision is based on memorandum of understanding, signed with the above mentioned, and we in our capacity as professionals, have been mandated and empowered by the Presidency to solely handle all foreign contractual payments and other external debt servicing exercise.
Do reconfirm your status, acceptability and willingness to be in South Carolina, U.S.A for your claim as per advised.

We urge you to co-operate with us in order to ensure a quick and final settlement of your payment.

We regret any inconveniences you may have experienced in the past while trying to receive your contract proceeds.

Yours faithfully,

Mr. Jerry Gana
Chairman.
Contract Review Panel

E:jerry.gana@senate.uk.tt

So which is it, "Senator", or "Mister", Jerry, eh? And the Nigerian Senate uses a Trinidad and Tobago e-mail host? Lame-O, Jerry, lame-oh! Or, to use a word that apparently no one else has ever used, MOBUS LAME-O!!

I Get E-Mail!

2008-11-20T17:00:00.000-08:00

Personally, I find the lack of a degree is holding me back. Since these yahoos have a serious problem with spelling, etc., why should I pay THEM money for a fake diploma, when I can go to the Magic Mill Diploma Generator and make my own?

Date: Thu, 20 Nov 2008 09:33:28 -0700
From: "Stephani Jong" s_jong_oj@iprolink.ch
Subject: Low education? now you can BUY Dip1oma/Degree/MasteerMBA at cheap dax eh0

Would you like to:
Increase Your Salary?
Increase Your Ability to find other work?
Increase Your Marketability?
Increase Your Desirability?

Please call: 1-718-989-5740 [Inside USA]
+1-718-989-5740 [Outside USA]

is an University Degree/Dip1oma holding you back?
Kindly call us To inquire about Our degree programs.

Whether you Are seeking a Diploma, Bacheelor, M B A/ P h D
We can Provide you credentials to get you Better Career
No Study, Exam, test, or courseworks required

Please call: 1-718-989-5740 [Inside USA]
+1-718-989-5740 [Outside USA]

Please leave us your "Name, country & phone no. with Countrycode"

Our staff will call tou back soon

I Get E-Mail!

2008-11-18T19:44:00.000-08:00

Another stupid email scam. Unbelievable!

Reply-To: monastic1@live.com
From: "Monastic Financial Security Company S.L" yb@yb.com.tw
Subject: Re: Your Winning Payment
Date: Mon, 17 Nov 2008 23:16:25 -0800

I am Joe Wright Managing Director, Corporate Services Division and Head of Swift Transfer Unit of Monastic Financial Security Company S.L, London UK. We wish to inform you that your winning fund was deposited in our vault.

That You were among the winners of an INTERNATIONAL PROMOTION PROGRAM. Participants were selected through a computer ballot system drawn from 2,500,000 email addresses of individuals and companies from all part of the world.

We are pleased to inform you that we have verified every aspect of your winning payment of US$3,000, 000, 00 and have submitted a written report to the Lottery Team and also validated your Winning payment and shall commence transfer of payment upon receiving your confirmation because there are mixed up in your payment details.

PLEASE CLARIFY THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION

1. Did you at any point transfer your claim to one Mr. Fernandez Gomez whose bank name and account number is written below, to claim and receive the payment on your behalf?

2. His claim was backed with a "Deed of Agreement" in his favor thereby indicating the fund destination to the following account. Account name Mr. Fernandez Gomez, Bank name: H. S. B.C
3. Account No 6179172979 You are required to as a matter of urgency confirm the legitimacy of the above claim and the reason for such change.

Please confirm to us immediately via as any delay could result to the call back of the accrued interest payment to the treasury account.

We await your response

Yours Sincerely,
Mr. Joe wright
For: Monastic Financial Security Company S.L,
London UK

Phone:+44 703 197 1997
Fax: +44 871 503 2596
E-mail: monastic1@live.com

I am intrigued by the "via" in the last paragraph. "Via" what, I ask? And just who is this "Fernandez Gomz" that is trying to make off with MY MONEY?

I Get E-Mail!

2008-11-15T11:02:00.000-08:00

My son Kelvin sent me this business opportunity! Wow, this could be the one!!

From: "Kelvin Andrews" enquiries_3@azet.sk
Subject: Western Union payment to your acc
Date: Sat, 15 Nov 2008 06:26:03 +0100

Dear Mom & Dad,

This is a real business opportunity for anyone (within the US and Minors)
with a flexible schedule and transportation at the extreme. I need
collection agents for my international import / export business. This is a
real second income opportunity. Great for work at home moms and dads! Hours
vary between 2-10 hours a week. Depends on our need in your area. Everyone
who is accepted will be given trial assignments. Once you have proven that
you enjoy the work and want to continue the volume of collections and amount
you can earn will increase gradually.

Once you are accepted we will have our clients pay you on our behalf. You
will pick up payments for the company nearly every day per our instructions.
You will keep 10% of all collections as your commission for your work. The
balance will be sent to our suppliers per our instructions to you.

Requirements:

1. Honesty and Integrity--You are handling company funds.

2. Flexibility and Commitment. You need to be available when needed.

3. Attention to detail and ability to follow instructions.

4. Transportation to Pick up Payments and make Payment to Suppliers.

5. Available 7 days a week if needed.

6. Must have computer with Internet access.

7. Must be able to communicate via email and on the phone in English. Income
potential up to $500 a week or more once you have proven you are a
trustworthy representative who can handle your assignments in a timely
manner. If you are interested send an email explaining your qualifications
and why you think this second income opportunity is right for you.

8. If you have a bank account with any of customer friendly banks in the USA,UK,Canada and Australia will be
a added advantage.

Hurry! We have several openings worldwide and will fill these positions in
the next seven days. Every email will be answered. Following a phone
interview, if you are accepted, you must be ready to work immediately.

Note this is not a salaried position with benefits. Your 10% commission is
your pay. The volume of collections determines your earnings. Your earning
potential is based on performance. We do not discriminate on race, color or
religion. If you have a good work ethic you will do well with our company.

Sincerely,

Kelvin Andrews.
+44 703 594 9160

VP Human Relations International Division
Blue Tie Global Resources International

Oh, wait, I don't HAVE a son named Kelvin. Well, maybe the next email will pan out!

Crud, I deleted it already. Well, it WOULD have been funny. I'll have to try it again, later. There's always more spam!

I Get E-Mail!

2008-11-11T09:02:00.000-08:00

So the Brit's National Lottery sends out notices from an ".edu" TLD?
With the word "spam" in the subject line?
Yeah, I BELIEVE!

SUBJECT: [spam] To file for claim
FROM: "miller@ucc.edu"

To file for claim
The National Lottery
P O Box 1010
Liverpool, L70 1NL
UNITED KINGDOM
(Customer Services)
Ref: UK/9420X2/90
Batch: 08005/ZY369

To avoid your winning prize been auto cancelled, do not reply to this Email send all your replies directly to your assigned Fiduciary Agent ( mr.aaronjackson@hotmail.com)

RE: BONUS LOTTERY E-MAIL PROMOTION PRIZE AWARDS WINNING NOTIFICATION

We are pleased to notify you that The Uk National Promo Draw is don annually and lucky winners
Email address are selected randomly from Millions of World Wide Emails address, and your Email
address has been selected as one of the 7th lucky winners with E -ticket Number: 123418302 188,
Serial Number : 5368/02, Batch Number: R3/A312-59, Reference Number: LSUK/2031/8161/06 and
Lucky Numbers: 07. 10, 22, 24, 34, 44, (18 Bonus Ball), which is creditted to a total sum of
£1,200,000 (ONE MILLION AND TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND POUNDS STERLING) .This is from a total cash
prize of £7,200,000 GBP shared amongst the first Three (3) lucky winners in this category i.e.
Match 5 plus bonus. thousands of websites submits thier users emails address to us, in order
to enter their users in our annual UK National Lottery Promo.

To file for claim, you are required to provide us with the information below
for verification, including your below winning information:

E -ticket Number: 123418302 188
Serial Number : 5368/02
Batch Number: R3/A312-59
Reference Number: LSUK/2031/8161/06
Lucky Numbers: 4, 8, 4, 6, 0, 4, 6

Full Name:
Mailing address:
Permanent house address:
Country of resident:
Phone Number:
Age:
Marital Status:
Sex:
Occupation:
Annual Income:
E -ticket Number:
Serial Number :
Batch Number:
Reference Number:
Lucky Numbers:

Please send the above of your information to your assigned UK National Lottery Fiduciary Agent using
the following contact information

=========================================
Name: Mr.Aaron Jackson.
Email: mr.aaronjackson@hotmail.com
=========================================

CONGRATULATIONS!!!
At your disposal, we remain.
Very Truly Yours,
Miller Clinton

Copyright 1994-2008 The UK National Lottery Inc.
All rights reserved. Terms of Service - Guideline

I STILL don't get how these guys can spell "ficuciary", I mean "fiduciary", correctly, and then spell "their" as "thier"!! Not to mention the random letter "s" inserted here and there... Spell check, bebe! Use it!

I Get E-Mail!

2008-10-24T18:31:00.000-07:00

Besides all the stupid PediPaws spam I get, which I will NEVER buy, just on principle, I occasionally get a business proposition. This has got to be one of LAMEST I've ever received!

Subject: EMAIL
From: JOSEPH POON josephpoon_3@yahoo.com.hk

Good Day,
I have a business of US$22.4million for you.Please contact me for details.
Joseph Poon

Come ON, Joe, put a little effort into it!

I Get E-Mail!

2008-10-07T17:45:00.000-07:00

TWO completely independent people sent me this lottery-winning email, so it MUST be true!

Email #1

WINNING NOTIFICATION
"Geller, Callard L"

Company No. 02949433
SERIAL NUMBER: 5368/02
TICKET NUMBER: 8603775966738
Batch Number: 074/05/ZY369
Ref Number: UK/9420X/05

WINNING NOTIFICATION

We are pleased to inform you of the final announcement that you are
one of our beginning of the year winners of the UNITED KINGDOM ONLINE

PROMO AWARDS, held on 28th sep ,2008. You have won for your self a total sum of
£1,200,000 POUNDS STERLING.

However, no tickets were sold but all email addresses were assigned to
different ticket numbers for representation and privacy.The selection
process was

carried out through random selection in our computerized email selection
machine(TOPAZ) from a database of over 250,000 email addresses drawn from
all the continents of the world.

Please you are adviced to complete the form and send it immediately to
0Aour from the designated bank.

Fill the below information's and send to the fiduciary agent for your
Claims verification:
FILL THE CLAIMS FORM BELOW AND SEND
TO OUR CLAIMS AGENT FOR VERIFICATION
1. Full Names:
2. Address:
3. Age:
4. Sex:
5. Marital Status:
6. Occupation:
7. Phone numbers:
8. Country:

Name: Mr. Morrison Bonnie

e-mail: Morrison218Bonnie@live.com

Tell-+447024084588

Yours Truly,
Co-ordinator(Online Promo Programme)

Email #2

Contact Mr. Morrison Bonnie
"Durr, Kristin"

Company No. 02949433
SERIAL NUMBER: 5368/02
TICKET NUMBER: 8603775966738
Batch Number: 074/05/ZY369
Ref Number: UK/9420X/05

WINNING NOTIFICATION

We are pleased to inform you of the final announcement that you are
one of our beginning of the year winners of the UNITED KINGDOM ONLINE

PROMO AWARDS, held on 28th sep ,2008. You have won for your self a total sum of
£1,200,000 POUNDS STERLING.

However, no tickets were sold but all email addresses were assigned to
different ticket numbers for representation and privacy.The selection
process was

carried out through random selection in our computerized email selection
machine(TOPAZ) from a database of over 250,000 email addresses drawn from
all the continents of the world.

Please you are adviced to complete the form and send it immediately to
0Aour from the designated bank.

Fill the below information’s and send to the fiduciary agent for your
Claims verification:
FILL THE CLAIMS FORM BELOW AND SEND
TO OUR CLAIMS AGENT FOR VERIFICATION
1. Full Names:
2. Address:
3. Age:
4. Sex:
5. Marital Status:
6. Occupation:
7. Phone numbers:
8. Country:

Name: Mr. Morrison Bonnie

e-mail: Morrison218Bonnie@live.com

Tell-+447024084588

Yours Truly,
Co-ordinator(Online Promo Programme)

Wow, my fears are allayed, NO TICKETS were sold, only email addresses were used to pick da weiners. Ah, yes, using TOPAZ machine, I see. Why never SAPPHIRE? Not to mention Merlin, Arthur, Galahad, Vyvyan, Lancelot, Garnet, Opal, Amethyst, Moonstone, Pearl. And then there is poor, retired, Guinevere...

By the by, the UK National Lottery has a page about email scams...

I Get E-Mail!

2008-09-23T19:19:00.000-07:00

I just love the name "Precious". I recall a fellow in Basic Training who's back-home nickname turned out to be "Precious". Wasn't that fun when the D.I. discovered that! Guess what his military nickname became?

Back to the email, hey, I didn't know they had the intarwebs in refugee camps! What else do they have, running hot and cold water?

FROM MISS PRECIOUS DEBA
NICLA REFUGEE CAMP,
Ivory Coast
Email: pcdeba@live.fr

Dear Friend,

my name is Miss Precious Deba and am the only surviving
child of my parents who died in one of the mugabe's crazy
land reforms crises in zimbabwe.

i am contacting you not only because of my sympathetic
situation but also for your advise/help in the management of
an inherited funds worth of us$8.5m(eight million, five
hundred thousand dollars).

the funds in question was deposited with a private security
firm here in abidjan-Ivory coast by my late father.

i decided to leave my country(zimbabwe) for security reasons
as well as to increase my search for a reliable person who
can help me reform my life which is in shambles at the
moment
and having found your contact on the internet business page,
i hope you will not let me down or betray me at the end of
the day.

i am ready to compensate your much needed assistance as we
will agree when i get your nod of acceptance.

i will wait hopefully for your urgent and confidential
response as i assure you that it is a risk free transaction.

regards,

Pecious Deba
please reply to : pcdeba@live.fr

Hey, you misspelled your own name there, Pecious! And get your shift key fixed, it seems to have an intermittent!

I Get E-Mail!

2008-09-14T19:54:00.000-07:00

Yes, those sentences were THAT short! The guy must have a very narrow monitor! Maybe he typed it on a 22 column VIC-20!

Uk National Lottery Prize
Dave Troutt

Company No. 02949433
SERIAL NUMBER: 5368/02
TICKET NUMBER: 8603775966738
Batch Number: 074/05/ZY369
Ref Number: UK/9420X/05
WINNING NOTIFICATION
We are pleased to inform you of the

final announcement that you are
one
of our beginning of the year winners

of the UNITED KINGDOM ONLINE
PROMO
AWARDS, held on 13 semp , 2008.

You have won for your self
a total sum of £1,200,000 POUNDS

STERLING.

However, no tickets were sold but all

email addresses were assigned to

different ticket numbers for

representation and privacy.The

selection process was carried out

through random selection in our

computerized email selection

machine(TOPAZ) from a database of

over 250,000 email addresses drawn

from all the continents of the world.

Please you are adviced to complete

the form and send it immediately to

our Promotion manager through email

or fax for prompt collection of your

fund from the designated bank.

Fill the below information’s and send

to the fiduciary agent for your
Claims verification:
FILL THE CLAIMS FORM BELOW

AND SEND
TO OUR CLAIMS AGENT FOR

VERIFICATION
1. Full Names:
2. Address:
3. Age:
4. Sex:
5. Marital Status:
6. Occupation:
7. Phone numbers:
8. Country:

Name: Mr. Anord Scotty
e-mail: anordscotty@yahoo.com.hk

Yours Truly,
Co-ordinator(Online Promo

Programme)

Over a million pounds sterling...what's that in REAL money? hahaha, I am joking my friends in the isles! The TOPAZ machine makes its appearance again! Drawn from ALL the continents of the world? Antarctica, even? Well, people do live there. A few. Scientists. And there are all the penguins!

I Get E-Mail!

2008-09-02T19:44:00.000-07:00

Honest to goodnes, you use a word like modalities, the meaning of which I do not know, and then throw in things like "there grant" and "passed three year"? Bush league, baby. Get with the program!

COMPLIMENT OF THE DAY...
MRS ZHU YUNING

Good Day,

Let me start by introducing myself. I am Mrs. Zhu Yuning, Am an accountant
in the Fondazione Di Vittorio, established 1977 by the Multi-Million
groups and now supported by United Nations Organization (UNO) and the
European Union (EU), and conceived with the objective of human growth,
educational, and community development thereby uplifting the standard of
living of people. Below is the site.

1.http://www.fondazionedivittorio.it

After further investigation, it was discovered that some of the grant
beneficiary did not claim there grant and this grant funds has been in our
account for the passed three years. So, Seventeen Millions Five Hundred
Thousand United State Dollars is still lying in our account and no one
will ever come forward to claim it. What bothers me most is that according
to the laws of Italians, at the expiration of 4 years the funds will
revert to the ownership of the Italian Government. Against this backdrop,
my suggestion to you is that I will like to transfer the sum of
$17,500,000.usd for the payment of the Grants that was not claim by the
Recipients .

MODALITIES:

I want you to know that I have had everything planned out so that we shall
come out successful. I have an attorney that will prepare the necessary
document that will back you up as the Beneficiary, all that is required
from you at this stage is for you to provide me with your Full Names and
Address so that the attorney can commence his job.

After you have been made the beneficiary, the attorney will also fill in
for claims on your behalf and secure the necessary approval and of
probate in your favor. There is no risk involved at all in this matter,
as we are going to adopt a legalized method and the attorney will prepare
all the necessary documents. Please endeavor to observe utmost discretion
in all matters concerning this issue. Once the funds have been
transferred to your bank account we shall then share in the ratio of 70%
for me, 30% for you.

Should you be interested please send me your,

1, Full names,
2, private phone number,
3, current residential address,

And I will prefer you reach me on my private email address below:
(zhuyuning_02@ozu.es) and finally after that I shall provide you with more
details of this operation.

Your earliest response to this letter will be appreciated.

Kind Regards,
Mrs. Zhu Yuning.

I Get E-Mail!

2008-08-23T12:23:00.000-07:00

Two recent spams with the same subject line. I don't think these are REALLY from PayPal because:

Pay-PaIL.com is where it SAYS it's from.
The Survey link goes to http://www.christiangm.org/Forum/uploads/paypal.com/index.php, not PayPal. The Privacy Policy also links there.
It offers a prize, then it threatens me with deletion. Nice.

What's with the note on the SSL certificate? Woohoo, I'm impressed!

Credit Union: IMPORTANT :PayPal Account Verification
PayPal

Dear Customer,

CONGRATULATIONS !!!

You have been chosen by PayPal online department to take part in our quick and easy reward survey.
In return we will credit 100$ to your account - Just for your time!
Helping us better understand how our customers feel, benefits everyone.
With the information collected we can decide to direct a number of changes to improve and expand our online services.
The information you provide us is all non-sensitive and anonymous - No part of it is handed down to any third party groups.
It will be stored in our secure database for maximum of 3 days while we process the results of this nationwide survey.

We kindly ask you to spare two minutes of your time in taking part with this unique offer!
To continue please click the link below: Customer Satisfaction Survey >>

Copyright © 2008 PayPal, Click on the following link to review or obtain a copy of our
Privacy Policy Statement

If you fail to provide the required information your account will be automatically
deleted from the PayPal, Database

Note: We will be upgrading our yearly SSL EncryptedServer to prevent fraudulent
activity.
Reference ID: EEFNQMWJIFGNGWNWPOWONSHFXWZRWGKNLUUT

And the next one. This one links to antiquejewels.org. Can't PayPal afford their own server? Same threat of deletion, but no reward this time.

Credit Union: IMPORTANT :PayPal Account Verification

PayPal

	Hello, PayPal, Member	August 2008

It has come to our attention that your PayPal account information needs to be updated.
If you could please take 5-10 minutes out of your online experience and update your personal records,
To continue please click the link below: Click here

Thank you for using PayPal!
The PayPal Team

Please do not reply to this email. This mailbox is not monitored and you will not receive a response.

For assistance,log in to your PayPal Account and click thec Help link located in the top right corner

Accounts Management As outlined in our User Agreement, PayPal will periodically send you information about site changes and enhancements.

Copyright © 2008 PayPal, Click on the following link to review or obtain a copy of our
Privacy Policy Statement

If you fail to provide the required information your account will be automatically
deleted from the PayPal, Database

Note: We will be upgrading our yearly SSL EncryptedServer to prevent fraudulent
activity.
Reference ID: JUPGWXVPIUKZWSFVEINIIWXCBQIWCGTCYSI

I Get E-Mail!

2008-08-20T12:45:00.000-07:00

This is probably the worstly-written spam I have ever received, considering it is purportedly from the Bank Of Scotland, where one assumes they all speak and write SOME form of the English language. Do not these folks have spell -czech on there machines?

But, it IS shocking to think that poor James Wood, Regional Manager low these 15 years, has NOTHING to show for all his hard work.

It is indeed sad that he must resort to this scam. I am disheartened.

The Manager,
Bank of Scotland Limited,
HBOS Treasury Services,
33,Old Broad Street,
London EC2N 1HZ. Greetings From JAMES WOOD
.
This letter is not intended to cause any form of embarrasments, but ratherintended to contact your highly esteemed self. I am writing to seek
your consent in a private and confidential matter regarding some funds unaccounted for in our bank here in London during the last 2006
business year.I need assistance from a trustworthy and reliable Foreigner whom I will fillin as the beneficiary. Your major role would be to provide either an existing bank account or to set up a new Bank account immediately to receive this money and get 30% of the total funds as commission. There are practically no risks involved, thetransaction will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect us from any breach of the law, it will be simply a bank-to-bank transfer, and all I need from you is to stand claim as the eneficiary (next of kin)so that my head office can order the transfer to your designated bankaccount under few working days.

I am JAMES WOOD, the regional manager of Bank Of Scotland Limited, and I write you this proposal in good faith; I am married with five lovely kids. It is my duty as the regional manager to send in financial report to my head office in the capital city at the end of each business year. On the course of the last year 2006 business report, I discovered the sum of Twentysix million eight hundred and fifty thousand pounds sterlings 26,850,000.00. Thefund is of clean origin. The owner of this account is a foreigner, a program leader.Untill his death. The Late Prime Minister, Mr. Rafik Hariri. I willprovide all necessary information needed in order to claim this money.

Hoppingin God that you will never let me down now and in future. ok! Rafik Bahaa EdineHariri (November 1,1944 - February 14, 2005), was a Lebanese self-made billionaire and business tycoon,and was five times Prime Minister of Lebanon(1992-1998 and 2000-2004) before his last resignation from office on October 20, 2004. The late Rafik Hariri died on February 14, 2005 when explosives equivalent to around 300 kg of C4 were detonated as his motorcade drove past theSaint George Hotel in the Lebanese capital. Our head office is not aware of Funds and will never be aware of it. I have placed this funds on what we call escrow call account with no beneficiary and as an officer of this bank I cannot be directly connected to this money, hence i contacted you. If you accept to work with me I will appreciate it very much as you are the first and the only person I am contacting for this particular transaction. We will start the first transfer with sixteen million
pounds, upon successful transfer without any disappointment from your side, we shall re-apply for the payment of the remaining amount to your account. A this juncture i wish to tell you what prompted me to package this deal.

I have a 9-year old daughter who has leukemia, disease of the blood, and she needs a bone marrow transplant or she will die. I want this transplanting to be done in any good children hospital in your country if there is one. Once this fund is transferred into your account, I shall resign from my job and bring my family to start a new life in your country. I would begrateful if you would help me in looking out for good investment oppurtunities with my own part of the money in a very profitable business. I have worked for this bank for the past 15 years yet I have nothing to show for it, I really need your assistance to secure this fund as soon as possible. as soon as you receive this message if you think we can work together, so that we can go over the details. Send also your Private mobile phone and fax nos: for more proper elaborrations.PLEASE GET BACK TO ME WITH MY PRIVATE EMAIL FOR EASY CONTACT( james50wood@myway.com)
Truly yours,

JAMES WOOD,

Does poor James Wood know that he will have to PAY for that bone marrow treatment, as we do not have socialized medicine in this country?

Well, here's "hoppingin God" that he finds a way to deal with his daughter's health problem, as I can be of NO assistance to him!

I Get E-Mail!

2008-08-05T10:07:00.000-07:00

The Honorable Beneficiary here humbly submits these four spams, so I can delete from my spam-box!

All caps? What is this, a telegram?

ATTENTION HONORABLE BENEFICIARY
OCEANIC BANK PLC

ATM INTERNATIONAL CREDIT SETTLEMENT

OFFICE OF THE DIRECTOR OF OPERATION

OFFICE OF THE PRESIDENCY

OCEANIC BANK (PLC) OF NIGERIA

ATTENTION HONORABLE BENEFICIARY

THIS IS TO OFFICIALLY INFORM YOU THAT WE HAVE VERIFIED YOUR CONTRACT

INHERITANCE FILE AND FOUND OUT THAT WHY YOU HAVE NOT RECEIVED YOUR PAYMENT IS

BECAUSE YOU HAVE NOT FULFILLED THE OBLIGATIONS GIVEN TO YOU IN RESPECT OF YOUR

CONTRACT/INHERITANCE PAYMENT.

SECONDLY WE HAVE BEEN INFORMED THAT YOU ARE STILL DEALING WITH THE NONE

OFFICIALS IN THE BANK AND YOUR ENTIRE ATTEMPT TO SECURE THE RELEASE OF THE FUND

TO YOU HAS PROVES UNSUCCESSFULLY. WE WISH TO ADVISE YOU THAT SUCH AN ILLEGAL ACT

LIKE THIS HAVE TO STOP IF YOU WISHES TO RECEIVE YOUR PAYMENT SINCE WE HAVE

DECIDED TO BRING A SOLUTION TO YOUR PROBLEM. RIGHT NOW WE HAVE ARRANGED YOUR

PAYMENT THROUGH OUR SWIFT CARD PAYMENT CENTER ASIA PACIFIC THAT IS THE LATEST

INSTRUCTION FROM MR. PRESIDENT, UMARU MUSA YAR'ADUA (GCFR) PRESIDENT

FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA AND FEDERAL MINISTRY OF FINANCE.

THIS CARD CENTER WILL SEND YOU AN ATM CARD WHICH YOU WILL USE TO WITHDRAW YOUR

MONEY IN ANY ATM MACHINE IN ANY PART OF THE WORLD, BUT THE MAXIMUM IS ONE

THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS PER DAY, SO IF YOU LIKE TO RECIEVE YOUR FUND THIS

WAY PLEASE LET US KNOW BY CONTACTING THE CARD PAYMENT CENTER AND ALSO SEND THE

FOLLOWING INFORMATION TO HIM IN ORDER HIM TO PROCEED IMMEDIATELY:

1. FULL NAME

2. PHONE AND FAX NUMBER

3. ADDRESS WERE YOU WANT THEM TO SEND THE ATM CARD TO (P.O BOX NOT ACCEPTABLE)

4. YOUR AGE AND CURRENT OCCUPATION

5. A COPY OF YOUR IDENTIFICATION

HOWEVER, KINDLY FIND BELOW THE CONTACT PERSON AND CONTACT HIM IMMEDIATELY FOR

IMMEDIATE DELIVERY OF YOUR ATM CARD TO YOU AS THE RIGHTFUL CONTRACT

BENEFICIARY, ALSO DO CALL HIM IMMEDIATELY AND LET HIM KNOW THAT YOU HAVE SENT

AN EMAIL TO HIM FOR IMMEDIATE ACTION ON YOUR CONTRACT INHERITANCE OK, SO

CONTACT HIM NOW ALRIGHT:

MR. ANTHONY EKE

DIRECTOR, ATM PAYMENT DEPARTMENT

PHONE NUMBER: +234-802-712-7674

EMAIL: atmcenterx@hotmail.com

THE ATM CARD PAYMENT CENTER HAS BEEN MANDATED TO ISSUE OUT $8,300,000.00 AS

PART PAYMENT FOR THIS FISCAL YEAR 2008. ALSO FOR YOUR INFORMATION, YOU HAVE TO

STOP ANY FURTHER COMMUNICATION WITH ANY OTHER PERSON(S) OR OFFICE(s) TO AVOID

ANY HITCHES IN RECEIVING YOUR ATM PAYMENT.

FOR ORAL DISCUSSION, I CAN BE REACHED ON OR EMAIL ME BACK AS SOON AS YOU

RECEIVE THIS IMPORTANT MESSAGE FOR FURTHER DIRECTION AND ALSO UPDATE ME ON ANY

DEVELOPMENT FROM THE ABOVE MENTIONED OFFICE.

NOTE THAT BECAUSE OF IMPOSTORS, WE HEREBY ISSUED YOU OUR CODE OF CONDUCT, WHICH

IS (ATM-811) SO YOU HAVE TO INDICATE THIS CODE WHEN CONTACTING THE CARD CENTER

BY USING IT AS YOUR SUBJECT.

BEST REGARDS,

BARRISTER ROBERT SCHEEL.

This one may not be a rip-off, I don't know. Are there a lot of people going to Dubai? I saw on Sixty Minutes last Sunday that it IS a tourist destination. Frankly, for me, if I wanted to see desert, I sure as heck wouldn't fly half-way around the world to do it! But why do the links specify port 81 in the URL?

VIP REWARD CARD
Vice Versa

Shopping with the Vice Versa® reward card
Dubai has gained the reputation of becoming one of the foremost shopping hubs in the world. Vice Versa gives visitors to Dubai the opportunity to earn money while spending money. With the Vice Versa card, you can earn instant Cash-rewards every time you present the card in any of the 275 Partner Outlets in Dubai.

Some of Vice Versa's 275 Partner Outlets* are listed below indicating the reward rate. For a full partner lisitng please visit www.viceversacard.com.

ABS	10%	Dolce & Gabbana	10%	Paul & Shark	10%
Al Washia	12%	Dune	12%	Porsche Design	10%
ALDO	12%	GF Ferre	10%	Prada	10%
Alviero Martini	15%	Giorgio Armani	10%	Raoul	12%
Baldessarini	10%	Greg Norman	15%	Ray Ban	10%
Bally	12%	Gucci	10%	Rocco Barocco	15%
Basler	12%	Guy Laroche	15%	Shanghai Tang	10%
BCBG MAXAZRIA	10%	Hugo Boss	10%	Skechers	12%
Brioni	10%	Just Cavalli	15%	Spring	12%
Burberry	10%	Kenneth Cole	12%	Tommy Hilfiger	12%
Calvin Klein	10%	Lancaster	15%	Vintage 55	15%
Cartier	10%	Laundry	10%	Vogue	10%
Christian Dior	10%	Moreschi	12%	Von Dutch	12%
Coccinelle	10%	Nine West	12%	Zilli	10%

*Most brands are located at several locations in Dubai, including: Mall of the Emirates, Ibn Battuta Mall, Dubai Festival City, Jumeirah Beach Road, Burjuman Center, Bin Hindi Avenue, Deira City Center and Wafi City.

Enjoy the best of the City
Dining in Dubai is an exceptional experience and you can use the Vice Versa card in a wide variety of restaurants. Selected restaurants throughout the city will reward Vice Versa cardholders with up to 20% Card-Cash™.

Make your choice of: Chinese, European, Fusion, Indian, International, Italian, Japanese, Middle Eastern, North American, Pan-Asian, Seafood and Steakhouse or visit any of the great Cafe's situated in the malls.

Vice Versa has selected a variety of leisure activities across Dubai.
Get rewarded at the following activities:

Boat Charter (5-10%)
Golf (10%)
Art (20%)
Theatre (10%)
Seaplane sightseeing (10%)
Big Bus sightseeing (15%)
Dubai Dolphinarium (10%)

How to use the Vice Versa Card
Simply present your Vice Versa card every time you go shopping, dining or when booking leisure activities, and you will instantly receive up to 20% of the amount back on your card. Use the Cash-rewards (AED) as payment for your next purchase – for anything, anytime and anywhere with Vice Versa Partner Outlets.

Request your Vice Versa card today and make use of the great VIP privileges during your stay in Dubai.

Vice Versa - the smart way to travel!

For more information about Vice Versa visit www.viceversacard.com

Beware of this next one, the link for the Customer Verification Form isn't exactly as represented, it goes to some weird place in the UK.

Submit Your Bank of America Identity

Bank of America Inc.

...

Dear Bank of America customer,

Security and confidentiality are at the heart of the Bank of America. Your details (and your money) is protected by a number of technologies, including Secure Sockets Layer (SSL) encryption.
We would like to notify you that Bank of America carries out customer details confirmation procedure that is compulsory for all our customers. This procedure is attributed to a routine banking software update.

Please visit our Customer Verification Form using the link below and follow the instructions on the screen.

http://www3.bankofamerica.com/confirmdetails.jsp?referrer=22jdsewzraDadhkznzdeOkhb

Bank of America Customer Service

I like this one, it is something different. The box is in the mail!

LETTER FROM MR. BEN OFOR ABOUT YOUR CONSIGNMENT

Mr. Ben Ofor

OFFICE OF MR. BEN OFOR
MANAGER NATIONAL WARE-HOUSE

Attention,

This is to inform you that arrangements have been concluded as regards to the shipment of your consignment of funds to your country.

I choose to conclude it and make sure it is off already before contacting you. I found out that this consignment has been lying here because of non-payment of shipment fees.

This is why I decided to use my connections as the Shipment officer in charge of the National Security warehouse, (This is where all the abandoned consignments in Nigeria are kept at the orders of the Government of Nigeria.)

The consignment left Lagos Nigeria yesterday night en-route your country via London, It is a metal box, silver in color with a weight of about 150kg, the box is declared as containing diplomatic /inheritance documents only.

The name of the Courier Company based in London is Air Courier International Ltd.

Call me immediately so that I can give you the phone and fax numbers of the courier company in Italy so that you confirm when the consignment will arrive.

I choose to do this for you because I studied your file and discovered that you have paid a lot of money before abandoning this consignment and I believe you will compensated me well when you receive the consignment.

Note: I know the content of the Box because I could see the amount you are being owned by the Federal Government.

This is why I decided to get involved. You must also know that this arrangement do not concern all the people you were dealing with in Nigeria before today as this consignment/Payment has been surrendered to the Government, Hence my involvement

This is the contact number of the manager who is the right person to contact (+447031913872) his name is Mr. Mandy Peter; call him as soon as you get this mail today.

I wait for your call or mail.

Thanks
Dr. Ben Ofor

I Get E-Mail!

2008-08-02T12:55:00.000-07:00

Wow, I've won the Irish Lottery!

Congratulation, You Have Won 800,000.00 (GBP)
The Irish Lottery

11 G Lower Dorset Street
Dublin 1
Ireland

Result: http://www.irishlotto.net/

This electronic mail is to inform you that you have
won the sum of £800,000.00 (GBP) in the
Irish Lottery Official On-Line Draw.

The official draw for the aforementioned jackpot
was performed at the greater Dublin Office of the
Irish Lottery Commission at 9:44am on July 30,
2008, and was overseen by the accounting firm of House
& Beckermann LLC. In the above noted drawing, your
contact Email was selected from a pool of
24,667,309 potential winners.

Your winning Numbers are;
Winning Num: 03, 04, 05, 26, 32, 37, Bonus 09
Batch Num: Batch: R3/A312-59
Reference Num: Ref: LSUK/2031/8161/05

For additional information you must contact the
commission's fiduciary agent In the United Kingdom
at the below noted email address;

Mr. Terry Cole (Fiduciary Agent)
Email: ir.terrycole@hotmail.co.uk

For verification please provide your:

1.Full Names
2.Full Address
3.Telephone Number

and your above Batch and reference Number when responding.

Thank you and congratulation.

Thomas Stinson, Online Coordinator
Fudiciary & Notification Department
Lottery Commission of Ireland.

Takes a bit of nerve to link to the REAL Irish Lottery page which has a Scam Alert section, specifically mentioning fradulent "Agents" with Hotmail email addresses...

I Get E-Mail!

2008-07-26T17:24:00.000-07:00

This one is more personalized, it actually had my name in it!

SPECIAL ATTN TO// **** ******
FROM: Anthony Koja

Anthony & Associates Chambers Lome-Togo. Barr.

Anthony Koja,(Koja& Associates)
Barristers & Solicitors.
Block 15, Flat 10, Rue du Kegue,Lome-Togo.

Good Day,

I am Barrister Anthony Koja, a legal practitioner,I am the personal attorney to Engr.M.B.****** , he is a national of your country, He work with Shell Development Company and also exporter of Gold in africa. He used to be my client.

He died as the result of a heart-related condition on the 11th November 2004. His heart condition was due to the death of his wife and only son involve in the Air Flight Crashes in Benin Republic West Africa, Air Flight Aired on December 26th, 2003 reported On: http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/africa/12/26/benin.crash/index.html

After these several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to track his last name over the Internet, to locate any member of his family hence I contacted you.I have contacted you to assist in repartrating the fund valued at US$12 million left behind by my client before it gets confisicated or declared unserviceable by the Finance Bank where this huge amount were deposited.

The said Finance Bank has issued me a notice to provide the next of kin or have his account confisicated within the next twenty one official working days.

Since I have been unsuccesfull in locating the relatives for over two years now, I seek the consent to present you as the next of kin to the deceased since you have the same last names, so that the proceeds of this account can be paid to you. Therefore, on receipt of your positive response, we shall then discuss the sharing ratio and modalities for transfer.I have all necessary information and legal documents needed to back you up for claim.

This will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law. If this business proposition offends your moral values, do accept my apology. I must use this opportunity to implore you to exercise the utmost indulgence to keep this matter Extraordinary confidential.

All I require from you is your honest cooperation to enable us see this transaction through.

I expect your urgent reply.

Best Regards,

Barrister Anthony Koja(Esq).
Anthony& Associates Chambers Lome-Togo.

Other than that, it's a fairly standard spam mail, spelling errors. Don't these guys have spel cheak on their computors?

Animal Life

2008-07-20T13:35:00.000-07:00

Dead rat on the neighbor's garage roof. How rude in THAT!

At least I didn't write a poem about it.

I Get E-Mail!

2008-07-06T15:14:00.000-07:00

A short and sweet proposition:

Dear Friend
MR SONG LILE

Complement of the day,

Although you might be apprehensive about my email as we have not met before,My name is Mr Song Lile I work with the Hang Seng Bank.I have a business proposal in the tune of $19.5m to be transferred to an offshore account with your assistance. Once the funds have been transferred to your nominated bank account we shall then share in the ratio of 70% for me, 30% for you.Should you be interested Please treat this business with utmost Confidentiality and send me the following:

Full names,
private phone number,
current residential address,

Finally after that I shall provide you with more details,
my email address is songlile12@live.com
this is my private phone number Is:+852-367-86701.

Kind Regards,
Mr. Song Lile.

And it is nice to be told that I am complementing the day. How sweet! What a nice compliment!

I Get E-Mail!

2008-07-01T09:24:00.000-07:00

From the "Too Late" department.

Subject: IDENTIFICATION NUMBER:CPEL/OWN/9876.
Date: Mon, 30 Jun 2008 16:33:24 -0700
From: "Cristina Franco"

Ref: UK/9420X2/68Batch: 074/05/ZY369
IDENTIFICATION NUMBER:CPEL/OWN/9876.

Dear Winner,

We happily announce to you the draw (#1199) of the UK LOTTERY,held on
20th October, 2007. Your e-mail which subsequently won you the
lottery in the 2nd category. You have therefore been approved to claim
a total sum of 850,000 GBP. Your e-mail address attached to ticket
no.: 56475600545 188 with Serial no. 5368/02 drew the lucky
no.:13.16.22.43.47.49. {28} Bonus Ball. Our European agent will
immediately commence the process to facilitate the release of your
funds as soon as you contact him.

Your are to contact the following Transfer agents as stated below:

Mr Robert Hache Tell:+4470319 42268 Email:roberthacheunit@gmail.com
www.nationallottery.co.uk/player/p/results/results.do

Warm Regards,
Mr. Lorraine Dodds

So I win nine months ago and you are just getting around to telling me? Sorry, Mr. Lorraine, if that's the way you do business, I want nada to do with YOU!

And why don't do you not spring for your own email address, instead of sponging off of poor Christina Franco, eh?

I Get E-Mail!

2008-06-30T08:45:00.000-07:00

Short, but...weird!

新しいメールアドレスをお知らせします新しいメールアドレス： scottego_098765@yahoo.co.jp

Am Scott, I had BRAIN TUMOR, Before I became ill, I kept $9.5M in a SECURITY COMPANY, My Doctor told me that I will not survive this illness, I made a vow to uplift the down-trodden/Less-privileged who can not help themselves.Reply me for more details.

- Scott Ego

Hey, you calling ME "down-trodden"?? Yah little punk! I RESEMBLE that remark!

I Get E-Mail!

2008-06-25T19:58:00.000-07:00

Got another email from the IRS. You know, the one that uses Google Mail for their emails...

Your IRA tax refund notification (Payment ID 283-0176)
Internal Revenue Service refunds@gmail.com

A Secure Way to Receive Your Tax Return

After the last annual calculations of your fiscal activity we have determined that you are eligible to receive a tax refund of $620.50.
Please submit the tax refund request and allow us 3-9 days in order to process it.

A refund can be delayed for a variety of reasons.
For example submitting invalid records or applying after the deadline.

To access the form for your tax refund, please click here
Note: For security reasons, we will record your ip-address, the date and time.
Deliberate wrong inputs are criminally pursued and indicated.

Regards,
Internal Revenue Service

Copyright 2008, Internal Revenue Service U.S.A. All rights reserved.

Does the IRS actually refund parts of a dollar? I thought they rounded it off. I know I do when I send it in! Three to nine days to process it? It is to laugh! Note the scary warning in red; you will be "indicated"!!

You will note the "click here" link to a Canadian site, loudya.com. Whois give us this information:

Registrant:
loudya xxx
xxx
montreal, Quebec x0x0x0
Canada

Registered through: GoDaddy.com, Inc. (http://www.godaddy.com)
Domain Name: LOUDYA.COM
Created on: 20-Sep-04
Expires on: 20-Sep-08
Last Updated on: 28-Aug-07

Administrative Contact:
xxx, loudya  loudya1@hotmail.com
xxx
montreal, Quebec x0x0x0
Canada
5141111111      Fax --

Technical Contact:
xxx, loudya  loudya1@hotmail.com
xxx
montreal, Quebec x0x0x0
Canada
5141111111      Fax --

Domain servers in listed order:
NS.OPALE-NET.COM
NS2.OPALE-NET.COM

I Get E-Mail!

2008-06-23T17:50:00.000-07:00

Our first email is short and sweet. What the heck is Business Treasury Services? I guess if you are one, you know! I love the phrase, "If you are not user of the Chase Manhattan Bank Business please disregard this e-mail!", especially the exclamation point! So let me see if I have this straight--Chase Manhattan Bank has no idea who their customers are, so they send a blanket email out. Yeah, right!

Dear Chase Bank Internet Banking customer!

Our Maintenance Department is doing a scheduled website upgrade

By following the link below please commence the procedure of the user login approval:

https://www2.chase.com/ccp/clientconfirm.jsp/?unitid=21jdsewzraFZGDtcwhhOkhb

These instructions are to be e-mailed and followed by all members of the Business Treasury Services.

JP Morgan Chase Bank Group does apologize for the problems caused, and is very appreciative for your collaboration.

If you are not user of the Chase Manhattan Bank Business please disregard this e-mail!

--- This is automatically generated message please do not reply ---

Letter Number Two proudly announces:

I have a new email address!

You can now email me at: bensonjames47@yahoo.com

- FROM THE DESK OF MR.BENSON ZIK JAMES ABBEY INTERNATIONAL BANK 2 TRION SQUARE REGENTS PLACE LONDON NW1 3AN UNITED KINGDOM DEAR SIR,I AM MR.BENSON ZIK JAMES,A SOUTH AFRICAN NATIONAL WORKING AS THE HEAD OF FOREIGN EXCHANGE DEPARTMENT OF THE ABOVE MENTIONED BANK.ON NOVEMBER 6TH,2000,AN AMERICA OIL CONSULTANT/CONTRACTOR IN IRAQ.MR.JACK FERRER POWELL DEPOSITED THE SUM OF $6,500,000.00 UNITED STATES DOLLARS IN THE BANK SINCE 6TH OF NOVEMBER,2000.AND SINCE THEN WE HAVE NOT SEEN HIM AGAIN.ALL THE CONTACT HE GAVE WAS FAKE CONTACT.FINALLY WE DISCOVERED FROM HIS CONTRACT EMPLOYERS,THE PETROLEUM CORPORATION THAT MR.JACK FERRER POWELL,DIED IN THE PLANE CRASH ON OCTOBER 31,2000,(AN EGYPTIAN BOEING 767 FLIGHT 990)WITH OTHER PASSENGERS ON BOARD.RIGHT NOW I CONTACTED YOU IF YOU CAN AGREE TO CLAIM IT.ALL THE BACK UP DOCUMENTS WILL BE PROVIDED BY ME AND TEAM REDEPOSITING THIS MONEY WITH SAME NAME I NEED FROM A FAKE ADDRESS FROM YOU AND YOUR MOBILE TELEPHONE NUMBER,SO THAT AFTER THE DEAL THERE WILL BE NO TRACE OF ANY KIND.ONCE THIS IS DONE,I AM GOING TO RESIGN MY APPOINTMENT WITH BANK.PLEASE IF YOU KNOW YOU CAN DO IT,I A READY TO GIVE YOU 30% OF THE TOTAL SUM.JUST REPLY VIA MY EMAIL.BEST REGARDS,MR.BENSON ZIK JAMES

Yes, it was formatted just that way, except the green stuff was in a text box.

Speaking of fake Paypal emails, I discovered the other day that my Paypal account WAS locked up tight, apparently because I haven't used it in, probably, six years.

That's Hot!

2008-06-22T20:44:00.000-07:00

A blob of solder still melted into my shorts, even after being warshed, the last vestiges of the Great Soldering Accident Of 2008!

Remember kids, always wear your safety goggles when soldering!

Later!

I Get E-Mail

2008-06-18T20:16:00.000-07:00

Speaking of My Dears, here is another, of a sort.

From Mr Paul.
Reply To p.williams6@voila.fr

Attn: My Dear,

My name is Paul Kone, I am the Branch manager in one of the leading international bank in Cote D'Iviore.

I got your information during my search through the Internet. I am 47years of age and married with 3 lovely kids. It may interest you to hear that I am a man of PEACE and don't want problem, I only hope we can assist each other.

If you don't want this business offer kindly forget it as I will not contact you again.

I have packaged a financial transaction that will benefit both of us, as the Branch manager of My Bank; it is my duty to send in a financial report to my head office in the capital city Plateaux Abidjan at the end of each year.

On the course of the last year 2007 end of year report, I discovered that my branch in which I am the manager made seven million seven hundred fifty thousand dollars [$ 14.000.000.00] which my head office are not aware of and will never be aware of.
I have since place this fund on what we call SUSPENSE ACCOUNT without any beneficiary.
As an officer of the bank I can not be directly connected to this money, so this informed my contacting you for us towork so that you can assist receive this money into your bank accountfor us to SHARE. While you will have 30% of the total fund.

Notethere are practically no risk involved, it will be bank to bank transfer, all I need from you is to stand claim as the original depositor of this fund who made the deposit with our branch so that my Head office can order the transfer to your designated bank account.

If you accept this offer to work with me, I will appreciate it very much. As soon as I receive your response I will provide details to you on how we can achieve it successfully.
Reply To p.williams6@voila.fr

Best regards.
Mr Paul Kone.

I am not the maths whiz, but how does $7,750,000.00 equal $14,000,000.00? I am not too sure I want to entrust ANYTHING to this fellow!

I Get E-Mail

2008-06-16T18:28:00.000-07:00

This letter sounds familiar, but I love the salutation.

Hello Dear

My name is Mrs.Jennifer Peters; I am a dying woman who has decided to
donate what I have to you/church. I am 59 years old and I was diagnosed for
cancer for about 2 years ago immediately after the death of my husband who
has left me everything he worked for and because the doctors told me I
will not live longer than some weeks because of my health idecided to
WILL/donate the sum of $2 500 000 Two million five hundred thousand
dollars to you for the good work of humanity and also to help the
motherless and less privilege and also for the assistance of the widows.
I wish you all the best and may the good Lord bless you abundantly and
please use the funds well and always extend the good work to others.

Here is the Contact information of my Attorney below:
Orbin Law Firm
Abogado De Justicia
Calle Embajadores,106.2,Madrid,Spain
Notario & Tribunal
Sr Pedro Antonio
Phone/Fax:+34-693-220-723
Email:advocatepedro200@aim.com

and tell him that I have WILLED $2 500 000.00
to you and I have also notified him. I know I don’t know you but I have
been directed to do this. Thanks and God bless.

NB: I will appreciate your utmost confidentiality in this matter until the
task is accomplished as i don't want anything that will jeopardize my last
wish.
From Mrs.Jennifer Peters.

I'm not sure what that "NB" refers to. Wikipedia offers ideas:

The letters NB or Nb may refer to:

* (as N.B.) an abbreviation for nota bene, a Latin expression meaning "note well"
* An abbreviation for 'Not Bad', used in chat and slang when describing something adequate
* The symbol for the chemical element Niobium
* The ISO 639-1 abbreviation for the Bokmål written form of the Norwegian language
* The Canada Post Corporation provincial abbreviation for New Brunswick
* New Balance, a shoe manufacturer
* Narrowboat, a particular size of water vessel found on English canals.
* One of several areas named New Britain
* Nigerian Breweries, a beverage company in Nigeria manufacturing alcoholic and non-alcoholic drinks including: Heineken, Star, Gulder, Maltina, Amstel Malta, Legend, and Fayrouz
* North Britain, a historical term for Scotland

You will be glad, no doubt, that I didn't post the latest missive from fake Paypal. The Russian branch, apparently...

Thought For Food

2008-06-13T17:14:00.000-07:00

It's cake!

And it was good!

I Get E-Mail

2008-06-12T16:36:00.000-07:00

Oh no! My eBay account has a boo-boo! I better get my account restored RIGHT NOW!

Oh, wait a minute, that link goes to ejbay.co.uk, not ebay.com!!

Dear eBay customer,

During our regularly schedule account maintenance and verification we have detected a slight error in your billing information on file with us.

This might be due to either following reasons:

- A recent change in your personal information (i.e. change of address)

- An inability to accurately verify your selected option of payment due an internal error within our processors. We need you to confirm your identity in order to regain full privileges of your account.

If this is not completed by June 13 , 2008, we reserve the right to terminate all privileges of your account indefinitly, as it may have been used for fraudulent purposes.

- Click on the link below:

Account Restore Page

We thank you for your prompt attention to this matter and regret any
inconvenience this may cause.

Thank you,
eBay Global Collections

Oh, and spell check says that indefinitly should be spelled indefinitely.

But you DID spell fraudulent correctly, I guess!

I Get E-Mail

2008-06-11T20:06:00.000-07:00

Here's a new one!

How Are You,

My name is Mrs.Yekaterina Fedoseev, personal secretary to Mr. Boris
Mikhail Khodorkovsky, the arrested Chairman/Ceo of Yukos oil and bank
Menatep SPB Russia, who is presently in jail.

I have the documents of a large amount of funds which he handed over to me
before he was detained and has been sentenced to jail for not paying Taxes
and financing political parties (The Union of Right Forces, led By Mr.
Boris Nemtsov and Yabloko, a Liberal/Social Democratic Party led by Gregor
Yavlinsky) opposed to the government of Mr. Vladimir Putin, the President
thereby leading to the freezing his finances and assets.

After searching through the books of your country’s chambers of Commerce
and industries here in Russia I am contacting you to assist me To
re-profile this fund and equally invest this fund in your country.

The total amount of these funds to be re-profiled is Forty Six Million
Dollars (USD 46,000,000.00) and you will be getting 20% for your
Assistance. I shall furnish you with necessary information’s and my
identifications as soon I receive your acceptance which should be sent to
my private Email box: yekaterinaalexan@aim.com

Yours sincerely,

Mrs.Yekaterina Fedoseev

NB: I advice you read more of this ordeal from:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/3213505.stm
http://newsfromrussia.com/main/2005/03/29/58914.html
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/3042850.stm
http://www.supportmbk.com

Chambers of Commerce? Me? The Leftist Commie-Liberal Rantings guy?

Oh, and apparently my PayPal account is frozen again. How sad!

Later!

I Get E-Mail

2008-06-10T18:00:00.000-07:00

It's not what you think, I am not senile YET!!

Well, maybe I am, but this ain't it.

Mr. Slash got another one from these fine legal folks!

advocates...
hassan
hassan advocatehassan@eim.ae

Attn : Mr General manager

Dear Mr /

We are Advocates Without Frontiers law firm, whose head office is located at the Emirate of Dubai, and duly licensed to practice attorney and render legal consultancy all over the UAE.

We would kindly offer our service if you face anylegal problem in any place all over uae

For any clarification
You can contact us on
00971505065861
Advocate hassan

Feel free to make use of their services.

I Get E-Mail

2008-06-09T19:22:00.001-07:00

If you are in the UAE and need legal representation, I highly recommend these guys. Sincerely, Mr. Slash

Attn : Mr General manager

Dear Mr /

We are Advocates Without Frontiers law firm, whose head office is located at the Emirate of Dubai, and duly licensed to practice attorney and render legal consultancy all over the UAE.

We would kindly offer our service if you face any legal problem in any place all over uae

For more information visit our web site www.awfdubai.com

For any clarification
You can contact us on
00971505065861
Advocate hassan

I Get E-Mail

2008-06-03T20:14:00.000-07:00

More mail, so lame.

This one must be real, it's from Hong Kong!

My Greetings

Greetings of the day to you. It is understandable that you might be a little bit apprehensive because you do not know me but I have a lucrative business proposal of mutual interest to share with you. . I got your reference in my search for someone who suits my proposed business relationship. Let me start by introducing myself. I am Mr. Patrick K. W. Chan Executive Director & Chief financial Officer of Hang Seng Bank Ltd. I have anobscured business suggestion for you.

I will need you to assist me in executing a business project from Hong Kong to your country. It involves the transfer of a large sum of money. Everything concerning this transaction shall be legally done without hitch. Please endeavour to observe utmost discretion in all matters concerning this issue.

Once the funds have been successfully transferred into your account, we shall share in the ratio to be agreed by both of us. Should you be interested send the following details to kick-start the process;

Full name
Address, Nationality
Age, Sex, Occupation Marital Statu,
Private Phone Number, Private fax number

I will prefer you reach me on my private email address(patrickchan204@yahoo.com.hk) and finally after that I shall furnish you with more informations about this operation. Please if you are not interested delete this email and do not hunt me because I am putting my career and the life of my family at stake with this venture. Although nothing ventured is nothing gained. Your earliest response to this letter will be appreciated.

Kind Regards,
Mr. Patrick J.P. Chan

And I have an unobscured business suggestion for YOU, Mr. Chan! P'raps you could endeavour to figure just what it is!

And, I'm not telling ANYONE my Marital Statu!!

This one came on a humor mailing list I subscribe to. It's not much of a list, all I ever get, lately, is the occasional spam!

SAINT NICOLAS MATERNITY HOME
233 KIRIKIRI BARCELOS ROAD
NEITHERLAND AMSTERDAM.
TEL:337554345433

DEAR BELOVED ONE, GREETINGS IN THE NAME OF OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST

AM MRS LINDSDAY WHILE,A WIDOW TO LATE MIKEL WHILE AM 55 YEARS OLD, I AM NOW
A NEW CHRISTAIN
CONVERT SUFFERING FROM LONG TIME CANCER OF THE BREAST,FROM ALL INDICATION MY
CONDITIONS IS REALLY
DETERIORATING AND IT IS QUITE OBVIOUS THAT I WONT LIVE MORE THAN 2MONTHS,
ACCORDING TO MY DOCTORS,THIS IS
BECAUSE THE CANER STAGE HAS GOTTEN TO A VERY BAD STAGE.

MY LATE HUSBAND WAS KILLED DURING THE U.S. RAID AGAINST TERRORISM IN
AFGHANISTAN,AND DURING THE PERIOD OF
OUR MARRIAGE WE COULDN'T PRODUCE ANY CHILD.

MY LATE HUSBAND WAS VERY WEALTHY AND AFTER HIS DEATH, I INHERITED ALL HIS
BUSINESS AND WEALTH.
THE DOCTORS HAS ADVISED ME THAT I MAY NOT LIVE FOR MORE THAN 2 MONTHS, SO I
NOW DECIDED TO DIVIDE THE PART OF
THIS WEALTH,TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE CHURCH IN
AFRICA,AMERICA ASIA,AND EUROPE I SELECTED YOU
AFTER VISITING THE AFTER GOING THROUGH SERIES OF EMAILS AND I PRAYED OVER
IT.

I AM WILLING TO DONATE THE SUM OF $3.500,000.00(THREE MILLION FIVE HUNDRED
THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS)TO
THE LESS PRIVILEGED.

PLEASE I WANT YOU TO NOTE THAT FUND IS LYING IN A BANK AND UPON MY
INSTRUCTION,MY
ATTORNEY,WHO PRESENTLY IS IN UK WILL FILE IN AN APPLICATION FOR YOU FOR THE
TRANSFER OF THE MONEY
IN YOUR NAME.

LASTLY,I HONESTLY PRAY THAT THIS MONEY WHEN TRANSFERED WILL BE SURE FOR THE
SAID PURPOSE,BECAUSE I HAVE COME TO
FIND OUT THAT WEALTH ACQUISITION WITHOUT CHRIST IS VANITY.

MAY THE GRACE OF OUR LORD JESUS THE LOVE OF GOD AND
THE FELLOWSHIP OF
THE HOLYSPIRIT BE WITH YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.

I AWAIT URGENT REPLY THROUGH THIS EMAIL OR MY PRIVATE EMAIL
lindsdaywhile@gmail.com

YOURS IN CHRIST

MRS. SUSAN WHILE.

Hasn't anyone ever told Lindsday/Susan (What's up with THAT?) that typing in all caps is rude? A couple of questions come to mind: I wonder why a dying cancer patient is in a maternity hospital. How can one spell deteriorating correctly and mispel Christian?

I wonder if I could start a consulting business with these folks as clients, helping them with their grammar, spelling, spacing...

Later!

I Get MORE E-Mail!

2008-05-23T20:38:00.000-07:00

This so BOGUS!

----------------------------------------------------------------

Account Locked !

Dear PayPal Member,

Due to the number of incorrect login attempts, your PayPal Account has been locked for your security. This has been done to secure your accounts and to protect your private information in case the login attempts were not done by you..
At PayPal we care about your security so, for your protection we are proactively notifying you of this activity.

If you did not trigger this lockout, follow this link to Log on to your PayPal Online Account :

Click here to unlock your account !

Thank you for your prompt attention to this matter.

We apologize for any inconvenience.

Thank you for using PayPal!

Please do not reply to this e-mail. Mail sent to this address cannot be answered.

----------------------------------------------------------------

And in the original message if you click the link, you go to http://riojatorrent.com/manuales/maketorrent/SECURITY.html, which sure don't look like PayPal to ME!

I Get E-Mail

2008-05-23T17:23:00.000-07:00

More winnings!

----------------------------------------
I like this one. What's a Topaz machine? I am intrigued!

Company No. 02949433
SERIAL NUMBER: 5368/02
TICKET NUMBER:
Batch Number: 074/05/ZY369
Ref Number: UK/9420X/05
WINNING NOTIFICATION

We are pleased to inform you of the final announcement that you are
one of our beginning of the year winners of the UNITED KINGDOM ONLINE
PROMO AWARDS, held on 12th April , 2008. You have won for your self
a total sum of £1,200,000 POUNDS STERLING.

However, no tickets were sold but all email addresses were assigned to
different ticket numbers for representation and privacy.The selection
process was carried out through random selection in our computerized
email selection machine(TOPAZ) from a database of over 250,000 email
addresses drawn from all the continents of the world.

Please you are adviced to complete the form and send it immediately to
our Promotion manager through email or fax for prompt collection of
your fund from the designated bank.

Fill the below information’s and send to the fiduciary agent for your
Claims verification:
FILL THE CLAIMS FORM BELOW AND SEND
TO OUR CLAIMS AGENT FOR VERIFICATION
1. Full Names:
2. Address:
3. Age:
4. Sex:
5. Marital Status:
6. Occupation:
7. Phone numbers:
8. Country:

Mr Morrison Bonnie
Email: mailto:agentbonnieuk@yahoo.com.hk
Yours Truly,
Co-ordinator(Online Promo Programme)

----------------------------------------
Kinda lame, Mark!

新しいメールアドレスをお知らせします

新しいメールアドレス： markddssswww333@yahoo.co.jp

It has been instructed to effect your $2.1MillionUSD payment-Via (BANK-BANK TRANSFER)And you are to contact for more details/payment,along with your full names Bank Particullars/Address.Tel./Fax No.Date of Birth/Next of Kin/Occupation So get back asap so we can process your transfer.Mark S.

- PAYMENT

----------------------------------------
Sir Steven, your lack of effort amazes me!
But hey, you have a gmail account! Wow!

YOU HAVE WON 753.437.00 POUND, CONTACT PAYMENT BANK, MR.WILLIAMS TOTTY,
Email:nationwidehouse@gmail.com

Sincerely,
Sir Steven Smith, Coodinator
camelot lottery promo

----------------------------------------
Joy, I hear that a Topaz machine is the hot lottery email selection machine, you ought to look into it!

SOUTH AFRICA WORLD CUP LOTTERY 2010

Lottery headquarters:
464, Braxton court,
Carlton, eastgate
Johannesburg.

Reference number: ZAR/2324514325/2010

Batch number: SAA/2008/ZAR

Congratulations. The South African football association, safa is proud to
inform you that you have just won Two Million Five Hundred Thousand United
States Dollars (US$2.500, 000.00).

This lottery is sponsored by South African football association, safa with
fifty-six, 56 cooperate bodies.South Africa will be hosting the soccer world
cup in the year 2010.this will be the first ever World Cup to be held in the
continent of Africa. And we are celebrating this golden opportunity with this
lottery.

We are also using this lottery to create awareness towards the hosting of the
world cup in 2010 in South Africa.Don?t be surprise that you are one of our
winners. The aims of this lottery are to surprise our winners.

However no previous notification is given before your email address was picked
for this lottery. Generally email address are picked, the draws are processed
by the computer through a special program that is special designed for this
lottery, the program is known as Random Access Program (RAP)

This software picks email addresses from the internet and through a random
process, picks the winners through their email address.

CLAIMING OF PRIZE

To claim your cash prize please contact the lottery manager MR. MIKE SPHIWE
immediately with the following information:

Contact: MR. MIKE SPHIWE
Email: safa.claimsmanager@yahoo.com.hk

For security reasons, we advice all winners to keep this information
confidential from the public until your claim is processed and your prize
released to you. This is part of our security protocol to avoid double
claiming and unwarranted abuse of this program. Please be warned.

Congratulations!!!

Sincerely,
Mrs. Joy Charlotte
Promotions manager
World cup 2010
South Africa

----------------------------------------
I wouldn't recommend clicking on any of those...

I Get E-Mail

2008-05-19T20:32:00.000-07:00

Two of 'em today!

First, we have from...

From Mr Bamba Kofi
Auditing Department Unit,
Sky Finance Bank Togo.(S.F.B.T)
20, Rue Du Commerce,
B.P.3302 Lome Togo
+2280727170
With Due Respect,

I have a proposal for you - this however is not mandatory nor will I in any manner compel you to Honor against your will. I am 50, and work with a bank (one of the African leading banks in the West Coast). Here in this bank existed a dormant account for the past years which belong to a American national who is now Late Mr.Richard Burson who died on Egypt Air Flight 990 as you can confirm from this web page:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/502503.stm

When I discovered that there had been no deposits nor withdrawals from this account for this long period, I decided to carry out a system investigation and discovered that non of the family member nor relations of the late person is aware of this account. This is the story in a nutshell.

Now I want an account overseas where the bank will transfer this funds.Thereafter, I had planned to destroy all related documents for this account. It is a careful network and for the past eleven months I have worked out everything to ensure a hitch-free operation. The amount is not so much at the moment and plus all the accumulated interest the balance in this account stands at-(US$ 1.2 Million US Dollars).One Million Two Hundred Thousand Dollars.

Now my questions are:-
1. Can you handle this project?
2. Can I give you this trust?
3. Mail with your full name,private phone & fax number....

Consider this and get back to me as soon as possible. Finally, it is my humble prayer that the information as contained herein be accorded the necessary attention, urgency as well as the secrecy it deserves.

Note:Do reply me only through my directly email mrbambakofi@yahoo.com

I expect your urgent response if you can handle this project.

Best regards,
Mr Bamba Kofi
+2280727170
(S.F.B.T) Togo

And the next...

Dear/Madam

How are you doing? I hope this mail gets to you in good condition. This issue came up & requires serious consideration. I work for the accounts section of my bank. Do you know there is an account opened here since 1990 and after the year 2000, nobody has operated on this account again till date. After going through some papers, I found out that if I do not take out this money it would be lost just for nothing.

The owner of this account is Late Mr. Andreas Schranner, from Munich , Germany who died along with the entire family in July 2000 in a plane crash.

Here is the website which I will appreciate you going through to read the information. No other person knows about this account or anything concerning it, the account has no other beneficiary and my investigation further proved to me that his company does not know anything about this account and the amount involved as he made it his personal account.

The money outstanding before his death was ($25.5 Million) Twenty Five Million Five Hundred Thousand Dollars, I am now contacting you as a foreigner because this money can not be approved to a national with a local bank account here. But can only be sent to any other account because the money is in dollars and the owner of the funds was a foreigner so the management is ready to approve this payment to anybody outside the country who has correct information of this account, which I will make available to you immediately you show your interest.

I expect you to act as foreigner and beneficiary to the fund as I will then intimate you on the processes abound as well as procure all the necessary documents required to lay claim to the funds, If you are capable and willing to handle such amount in strict confidence and trust according to my instructions and advice for our mutual benefit I shall highly appreciate.

I need trusted person in this business because I do not want to make mistakes, I need your strong assurance and trust,

With my position now in the office I can affect transfer of this money to any foreigner's reliable account, which you can provide with assurance that this money will be intact pending until my arrival in your country for disbursement. On the alternative, you can come down here to South Africa for us to meet one to one, to enable us sign a binding agreement.

As soon as you receive this money into a your account, I will proceed to your country for onward percentage distributions and investment.

At the conclusion of this business, for your assistance, 25% of the total amount will be given to you, 70% for me, while 5% will be for expenses both parties might have made during the process of the transfer.

Your earliest response is urgently awaited, kindly reply to my Email address<>

Mr. Mayo Kennedy
+27 78 185 6608
mayo.knnd@gmail.com

I Get E-Mail

2008-05-15T18:51:00.000-07:00

Once again, I am "defiantly" "re gret"ing my decision not to answer this email. How many millions have I missed out on, so far?

----------------------------------------------------------

MOTTO: FIGHTING POVERTY ROUND THE WORLD

Microsoft Award Team
20 Craven Park, Harlesden London NW10 United Kingdom
Ref: BTD/968/05
Batch: 409978E

CONGRATULATION! CONGRATULATION!! CONGRATULATION!!!

Dear. Sir/ Madam,

The prestigious Microsoft and Aol has set out and successfully organised a Sweepstakes marking the year 2008 anniversary we rolled out over US$ 400,419,864 for our new year Anniversary ( EASTER) Draws. Participants for the draws were randomly selected and drawn from a wide range of web hosts which we enjoy their patronage.

The selection was made through a computer draw system attaching personalised email addresses to ticket numbers. If you ignore this massage, you will defiantly re gret it lat er. Microsoft and AOL are now the largest Internet companies & in effort to make sure that Internet Explorer remains the most widely used program, Microsoft and AOL are running an e-mail beta test.

Your email address as indicated was drawn and attached to reference and ticket number 008795727498 with serial numbers BTD/9080648302/06 and drew the lucky numbers 14-21-25-39-40-47(20) which subsequently won you $ 720, 000.00 (Seven Hundred & Twenty Thousand United States Dollars Only ) as one of the 5 jackpot winners in this draw. You have therefore won the entire winning sum of $ 720, 000.00 (Seven Hundred & Twenty Thousand United States Dollars Only ) The draws registe red as Draw number one was conducted in <>Brockley, London United Kingdom on the 20th of March,2008. These Draws are commemorative and as such special.

Please be informed by this winning notification to file your claims immediately.You are adviced to make contact to your referred agent who shall by duty guide you through the process to facilitate the release of your winning prize by our African payment offshore bank. To file for this claims, Please Contact your delivery agency in the contact information below:

N AME OF COURIER FIRM: FRONTIE RS DELIVE RY SERV I CES
OFFICE ADDRESS: 102 Oxfo rd Street London,WC1N 3HR United- Kingdom .

DELIVERY AGENCY CONTACT INFORMATION:
CLAIMS AGENT
Name: Mr. Larry Moore
Phone: +27 78 345 1610
E-mail:advocatelarrymooreclaimagent@gmail.com
E-mail:larrymoore2@hotmail.co.uk

You are to provide the claim agent with the under listed information as soon as possible:
1. Name In Full:................................
2. Address:.....................................
3. Nationality:.................................
4. Age:.........................................
5. Sex..........................................
6. Occupation:..................................
7. Marital Sta tus:..............................
8. Phone......... ..............................
9. Fax:........................................
10.Wining Refe rences :
E, TOTAL AMOUNT
Won........................... ..........................
Ref /Ticket No: .................................. ......
Serial No: ............................................
Winning No:........................................

We dedicate our special thanks & gratitude to Bill Gates and his associates.We wish you the best of luck as you spend your good fortune in this season.

Note: You have One week from the date of this pu blication to claim your prize or you may forefeit your winnings. Thank you for being part of our commemorative New year Anniversary Draws.
<>

DO NOT REPLY TO THIS EMAIL BECAUSE YOU MIGHT NOT BE ATTENDED TO. KINDLY CONTACT YOUR FIDUCIARY AGENT DIRECTLY FOR FURTHER DIRECTION

-----------------------------------------------------------------

I don't know much about international telephony, but I think the "fiduciary agent' is located in Mobile, South Africa. Or maybe, on reflection, he HAS a mobile in South Africa! Ha ha on me!

Spam For Lunch!

2008-05-04T12:43:00.000-07:00

I get e-mail. How come these esteemed bank officers have such poor spelling?

Mr.Philip Clive
Senior Audit Officer
Natwest Bank Group
UK.

Dear Friend,

I am Mr.Philip Clive Senior Audit Officer of Natwest Bank Group UK.Natwest Bank London.I am writing following an opportunity in my office that will be of immense benefit to both of us.

In my department we discovered an abandoned sum of £20.5million British Pounds Sterling(Twenty million five hundred thousand British Pounds) in an account that belongs to one of our foreign customers Late Mr.Morris Thompson an American who unfortunately lost his life in the plane crash of Alaska Airlines Flight 261 which crashed on January 31 2000,including his wife and only daughter.

You shall read more about the crash on visiting this site.

http://www.cnn.com/2000/US/02/01/alaska.airlines.list/

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his next of kin or relatves to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it unless somebody applies for it as next of kin or relation to the deceased as indicated in our banking guidelines.

Unfortunately I learnt that his supposed next of kin being his only daughter died along with him in the plane crash leaving nobody with the knowledge of this fund behind for the claim.It is therefore upon this discovery that I and my coleague in this department now decided to make business with you and release the money to you as the next of kin or beneficiary of the funds for safety keeping and subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and we don't want this money to go back into Government treasury as unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidelines here stipulates that such money remained after ten years the money will be transferred into banking treasury as unclaimed funds.

We agreed that 35% of this money will be for you as foreign partner,while the balance will be for me and my colleague.I will visit your country for the disbursement according to the percentages indicated above once this money gets into your account.Please be honest to me and trust is our watchword in this transaction.

Note this transaction is confidential and risk free. As soon as you receive this mail you should contact me by return mail. All necessary arrangement for the smooth release of these funds to you has been finalised.

If you are interested in this project contact me direct to my email id: philip.clive@googlemail.com with the following personal informations to commence!
1.YOUR FULL NAMES
2.CONTACT ADDRESS
3.TELEPHONE AND FAX NUMBERS
4.AGE,OCCUPATION AND MARITAL STATUS

Upon receipt of your personal information we will process all the legal documentation in your favor through an Attorney, making you the sole beneficiary and legal next of kin to the said claim. The attorney will represent you in my bank for the reactivation of the inheritance funds on your behalf. He will process and obtain all the relevant legal documentation thereby authenticating you as the legal next of kin to the inheritance funds. After this,the money will be release to you for both of us.

I await the required personal information to commence.

Best Regards,

Mr.Philip Clive

I Get E-Mail

2008-04-29T19:22:00.000-07:00

I can't use this, maybe YOU can:

Reply-To:
From: "MR LARRY WOUNDER"
Subject: CLASSIFIED INFORMATION
Date: Wed, 30 Apr 2008 00:20:41 +0100

From Mr. Larry Wounder
The Branch Manager
Eco Bank Ghana Ltd,
First Light Branch
Accra-Ghana

My Dear Friend

How are you today ? i hope you are doing fine? if so thanks be to ALMIGHTY GOD, who gave us life. Let me start by introducing my self. My name is Mr Larry Wounder, i am a branch manager in Eco Bank of Ghana Limited, First Light branch Accra. I am a Ghanaian married, but my wife dead nine months ago,she left me with two kids. However I am writing to request for your honest assistance to help me receive the sum of US$7, 750.000.00 million Dollar into your private bank account. This fund was what i discovered in my branch as operational profit last two years{2006} as a result of my hard work and commitment to service last 2 years (2006) I have already submitted an approved(2006 & 2007) End of the Year financial report to my Head Office here in Accra Ghana. However this amount that i want you to receive for me is an excess fund in my own branch of the bank and my senior directors do not know anything about this excess fund in my branch. Since then,I placed this money(US$7,750.000.00). on a SUSPENSE ACCOUNT that is not reactivated, dormant account without any beneficiary for now.

As a branch manager I cannot be directly connected to this money, this is the reason why I want your assistance to receive this money into your bank account. However if you can come to Ghana it will also help us, then i will direct you on how to claim the money here and take your share and i will take my share. I intend to part 40% of this fund to you while 57% shall be for me, and percent(3%) shall be for expenses like you coming or any other thing that comes up, I also want you to know that there is no single risk involved in this business. It is going to be a bank-to-bank transfer to your nominated bank account anywhere you feel safer in this world, this is if you can not come to Ghana, but if you wish to come i will provide visa for you to come. All I need from you is to stand as the original depositor of this fund. If you accept this offer, I will appreciate your timely response.
Also you can forward your private phone number for speedy relation on this matter.

Remember l am still working in this bank, your confidentiality is needed in this transaction. Please trust and honest is the watchword of this our transaction.

Thanks and best regards,
Mr. Larry Wounder
PLEASE REPLY TO MY PRIVATE EMAIL ADDRESS BELOW
mrlarrywounder@myway.com

Fig Bar Test

2008-04-21T20:21:00.000-07:00

I like fig bars, especially Vons Whole Wheat Fig Bars.

From 2008

I like to scrape the bottom of the cookie off with my two front teeth, break off the sides, then scrape out the filling. I like the grainy fig bar gunk that gets stuck in the crevices in my mouth.

There are a whole series of these fig bar pics I took. Someday, you may be lucky enough to see them all.

Actually, this is a test of the Google Picasa Web Album.

And why do all the pics of my face point up my nostrils??

Of Foam

2008-04-13T12:28:00.000-07:00

I finally figured out, I think, why root beer foams up when you pour it is a glass.

It's BEER!

Have It

2008-04-11T18:01:00.000-07:00

Cake pics.

Some with flash, some without.

I couldn't pick one. Or two. So, you get ALL of them!

Vote for your favorite.

I Need Some Chow!

2008-03-31T18:25:00.000-07:00

It IS Audrey Jr.!!!

(Why is the guy out of focus?)

This is the high point of my creativity for the week. I wouldn't read any more posts till next week, if I was YOU!

Milky

2008-03-30T13:22:00.000-07:00

I was making tea this morning. While heating the water in the fabulous Sunbeam Hot Shot I poured dry milk powder in the cup, for some reason thinking I was having breakfast. I debated tossing it, but then thought back to the many English books and television shows I've seen. "Milk?", they often ask. Ok, I'll try it. Not bad!

Spring is popping out, especially noticeable after the little sprinkle we had last night.

Is that a sunflower, or is it Audrey Jr.?

I think these are the marigolds I'm growing from last year's saved seeds.

Ring about the daiseys! A ring of Gazanias around African daisies, with sunflower seeds hopefully growing in there somewhere! The mostly useless snail board sits off to one side.

Speaking of, I have been putting those iron phosphate snail killer pellets out, in deference to the the neighbor lady's turtles. I was down at Armstrong Nursery yesterday, looking for a watering can, which I couldn't find reasonably at Home Depot, Armstrong, or Target, but I digress...Armstrong DID have decollate snails. Unfortunately, I been using those pellets, so I have to wait three weeks at least before I can put out those snails. I really want to try them, but I fear they will be gone from the store before then. I COULD order them from Mary's GoodSnails, but you know how I am about this internet stuff...

What's Cups, Doc?

2008-03-28T17:47:00.000-07:00

A little comparison of cups:

The ALA coffee cup holds a little LESS than 1 ¼ cups, 9 fluid ounces it looks like.

The Shh, I'm Reading cup holds a little MORE than 1 ¼ cups, very nearly 10 fluid ounces.

The UC San Diego coffee cup holds OVER 2 cups, I would say 18 or 19 fluid ounces. The measuring cup is FULL to the BRIM!

(Did you note how Pyrex® is plastered all over the Corning product, while Anchor-Hocking goes for a more restrained look?)

The measuring cup holds, as you probably guessed, 2 cups of beverage.

So that makes the UC San Diego cup the CLEAR WINNER!

Of Glass, And Measuring Cups, And Teeth

2008-03-19T20:51:00.000-07:00

My jaw seems to have picked up a nice click, what with all the dental work the last couple of weeks. Had a tooth ground off today and the temp crown laboriously attached.

But on to other things...

Most people are familiar with Pyrex®, a product of Corning Inc. since 1915. It has almost become a generic term for glass cookware, which I am sure their lawyers strive mightily to counteract! My mother always had Pyrex® cooking ware, and so that is what I grew up with.

When I went to the store to purchase a new, big, measuring cup, all they had was the unfamiliar, weird-looking, Anchor Hocking brand. Never heard of it. Didn't buy it, didn't trust the odd blue lettering.

Well, I couldn't find a Pyrex® measuring cup easily, so eventually I purchased the blue thing. I've had it quite a few years now, and it worked just fine, as a measuring cup, a cocoa mug, and lately, as a tea mug.

Closeup of the arcane symbols on the bottom of the measuring cup.

Anchor Hocking seems to be promoting red lettering on their measuring cups now. Maybe to confuse the confused consumer? Surely not!

Now that I've the BIG UCSD mug (see yesterday's post), I can retire this puppy to its rightful use.

Later!

2008-03-18T10:25:00.000-07:00

One of my admirers and/or readers, apparently not comfortable with my choice of an Anchor Hocking measuring cup as a tea mug , has sent me a replacement:

A mighty UC San Diego coffee mug!

How about that? Many thanks!

Also, observe the discovered Bike Nashbar Osprey sunglasses, in a delicious shade of chocolate brown. Yummy!

Finished Dead Heat, by Dick Francis, this morning. From it I learned how to fool a mare into thinking it is preggers, but more importantly, I learned that kidney beans can make you VERY sick if not cooked enough. I did not know that, as Peg might say. More information here and here and here.

Later!

Cookies Redux

2008-03-11T06:01:00.000-07:00

Found a bit about Linda of Linda's Cookies here.

2008-03-09T12:06:00.000-07:00

A pleasant break is to have a cup of coffee and a chocolate chip cookie, warm from the, well, it must be a warming oven, as the baker seems to be in Buena Vista, where ever that is!

Please forgive the big picture, it just looks better that way!

I'm not the only one who likes them, lil lady says, "12.Im upsessed with the cookies at my school (Linda's cookies)."

Can't find any info. about the cookies or the company on the 'net, must be doing SOMETHING wrong. I would like to know the carb count on these puppies...

Tea For Me

2008-02-16T14:39:00.000-08:00

Got some tea for Valentine's Day!

From left to right we have:

Revolution Southern Mint Decaf
Revolution White Tangerine
Revolution Royal Plum Decaf
Dallmayr Pefferminz
Twinings (of London!) Earl Grey
Twinings English Breakfast
Revolution Bombay Chai
Revolution Honeybush Caramel Dessert

I found the Souther Mint to be delightful, the White Tangerine to be too subtle, and the Earl Grey a tasty pic-me-up after a morning's chilly cycilng.

Sweet

2008-01-26T11:31:00.000-08:00

Saw this YouTube Skittles commercial linked from reddit.

"I met a man on the bus today."

YOU might have seen it already, but I didn't.

Hate Skittles, love the commercials!

Zoom zoom

2008-01-24T17:45:00.000-08:00

Zooomr is moving to Japan, so no images can be uploaded.

So, visualize a pic of a distorted barcode HERE.

Best I can figure, someone stomped on it with a stiletto-heel shoe and ground it around a bit. The lamination over the barcode seems to have shifted around a bit, but the lower level of print stayed put. I've never seen anything like it. These are what I think are called photocomposed barcodes. They looked like they are "printed" on photographic paper, and are quite sturdy, as compared to something I might whip out on the laser printer using label stock. Like I implied, this barcode was on an I.D. type (and yet not) of card that was hot-laminated.

Music for the day, in the vehicle, was Disraeli Gears. I swear there was a scent of patchouli oil in the air! Or maybe just the Fresh Mountain Scent of my laundry detergent...

Speaking of Lou Reed and friends, several people (and by that I mean no one) complained about my post yesterday showing appreciation for a drug-related song. Well, I AM something of a minor fan-boy of Lou and the Velvets, having several CDs, cassette tapes, and albums. Even went to a Lou Reed concert, back in the day. And that's something, I've only been to three rock music concerts! Plus one Ska performance.

My friend had a Lear 8-track stereo in his MG-TD. We used to blast through the neighborhood playing White Heat/White Light at quite a volume. I didn't care for it much, then, but eventually grew appreciate it, as I was sucked into the dark vortex of the hippy-dippyness of 1969-1970.

Repetition breeds!

Cookies

2008-01-23T17:56:00.000-08:00

I mentioned the Hydrox thing to a couple of people. One said Hydrox was the inferior version of Oreos. I was outraged! The other said that Hydrox was the superior cookie. Greats minds, eh?

There was something quite interesting in Time magazine (January 28, 2008) this week that I was going to mention, but now I can't remember what it was, and can't find it. So much for the great mind...

I was listening to the KGB this afternoon while driving home. The Lou Reed song "Walk On The Wild Side" came on. Oddly, there was a skip in the song right where "that phrase" is. You know the one. They've been playing this song for, what, twenty years, and now have decided to censor it? I think that's just wrong. Don't play it at all, if you think it has inappropriate lyrics, is what I say. Don't cut the freaking song!

I always wondered why they would play that song, and not "Heroin", which is a better song, and is totally not pro-drug, unlike that stupid "Cocaine" song which gets endless air play. Unless one is so alienated it probably wouldn't matter much, anyway. It's certainly not the " Hither come and suck a pipe, turn thy brains to cheese and tripe!." sort of hippy-happiness.

To digress, the only time I've ever heard "Heroin" on the air was on Radio Netherlands on short-wave (Is there a regulation about how many times one can use "on" in a sentence?). I would provide you with the date and time, and decade, but I am too lazy to go out to the chilly garage and dig out the log book, which is not actually a book, but a clipboard of paper sheets.

Anyway, I blame everything, yes everything, on that Jackson woman.

News Flash

2008-01-22T21:40:00.000-08:00

You already knew this, but I just found out.

The Hydrox is no more.

Check out this article: The Hydrox Cookie Is Dead in the Wall Street Journal. I always preferred the Hydrox over an Oreo. They seemed crisper, and more chocolaty. "Hydrox eaters tend to be independent-thinkers, favor underdogs and be skeptical of corporate marketing" says the article. Yep, that me! Pretty much.

I guess they have been gone since 1999, renamed Droxies, then in 2003 Kellog stopped making them. I stopped eating cookies, pretty much, around then, because of my pre-Sugar Sickness.

I'm always the last to know.

Just ForThe Record

2007-12-05T18:37:00.000-08:00

For future reference:

Six Plus Three Equals Nine!

Apparently I have a problem with simple arithmetic...

Also spelling, as spell check informs me I mispelled "arithmetic" the first time around. Anyway, yesterday we got a check from another location. I totaled up the charges (several times), it looked like three bucks too much. So I wrote a LONG note to finance explaining my figures, and asking what to do about it. Finance says, you added wrong. I re-figured. and re-figured. Finally used a calculator. Yikes! Back to third grade for me!

Bombing Out

2007-11-20T18:42:00.000-08:00

Finally finished a Minesweeper game at "expert" level.

And yet, SOMEONE who doesn't EVEN (as Bob Verley might say) live here anymore has high score!

The injustice!

See the pretty desktop image? That was taken by that high scorer.

UPDATE: I have been told that the desktop picture is from the Gigapxl Project. Sorry about that, Chief!

Beat Out

2007-10-09T17:38:00.000-07:00

Driving home from the grocery store, I was dismayed to be beat off the line by a Prius!!!

One of those funny-looking cars with the funny looking wheels.

One of those cars that I asked my son about, "What is that pimped-out looking thing?"

I get funny looks from him...

So Mr. Prius is in the lane on my right, zooms ahead by 100 feet, suddenly zooms left two lanes, only turning on his signal when he is already over lane, just like an SUV driver.

Then he turns into a left-hand turn lane (to Costco), THEN zooms back out in front of me, apparently having decided he WASN'T a Costco member at this time.

Or something.

But he DID have the turn signal this time.

So then he turns left at the NEXT intersection, which is a two lane turning left deal. Naturally, he gets into the inside lane, the short line.

The lane I'm not in.

And naturally, after the left and half-way up the hill, he cuts over into my lane, only he's about ten cars in front me by now.

I guess being ecologically-minded doesn't make one less of a weenie.

Coming Loose

2007-09-29T20:14:00.000-07:00

It was a bit windy the other day, I suppose it was just too much for this insulator.

Or at least, the wood into which it was screwed. There are two more insulators up there, the Gas & Electric guy just fastened the service drop to one of them, but he said they were a bit loose too, so he thought the 2x4 they are screwed into should be replaced.

It was entertaining listening to the upstairs guy trying to explain to the building manager (on speaker phone) what the problem was. She didn't seem to be getting it. The Gas & Electic guy showed up within a few minutes, probably a half-hour, so someone must have made it sound like an emergency.

It's been kind of bummer week. Two people have passes away that I know. One was WAY too young, the other, well, older than me, but still. Heck of a nice guy. Life just seems cruel, sometimes, but then, that's life, I guess.

Big Eyes

2007-09-20T17:31:00.000-07:00

Here's something to freak you out, and mess up the blog formatting for a while...

(You may have to right-click and choose "View Image" to enjoy the fullness)
(If I had a Macintosh, I would put Mac-specific instructions here. But, I don't.)

Feel free to use it as your desktop image!

Gar. Da. Tu.

2007-09-18T21:45:00.000-07:00

Spent two hours trying to find out what that movie was, with the blonde guy holding something up, that was on television Sunday night, that I only saw a few minutes of.

One would think one could just set the date back a couple days on the TV Guide Listings. Oh, no.

No no no no.

You would be mistaken! It only goes back to yesterday.

Thank you so much!

Nice thing about a print edition, it doesn't disappear a couple days later.

Unless the dog eats it.

Finally found the week's movie listing, in .pdf format, on the Onion Tribunal website, SignOn San Diego. Had to text search for "Sun.", but eventually something looked likely.

It was Momento (wiki ariticle, in case you missed the movie.)

But then, YOU knew that!!

A Rememberance Of Things Past

2007-09-16T20:29:00.000-07:00

I once had an Honda XL250. A nice, sturdy bike. Ran well, once I replaced the wrong carb some guy had stuck on it with the correct, stock, one.

The big plastic gas tank was a selling point for me when I bought this, as was the Preston Petty front fender.

The lad commented, on seeing this pic, that I haven't lost much more hair since then. But I HAVE lost some weight! Probably stoped wearing jeans around then, too.

The trusty bike broke down one day on the way to work. I parked it, LOCKED, it was gone when I came back after work. I went home to report it to the San Diego police, but since I don't LIVE in San Diego, I had to drive back to San Diego so they would take a report. Is that screwy?

I got it back a year later. The police caught the neighborhood kids who had stolen it. It was all beat up, and a footpeg bolt was broken off in the frame. The kids had to pay restitution, but since I had just priced replacement parts, and not actually had a shop estimate replacing the footpeg bolt, I didn't get much. I broke off a bolt remover in the bolt, so I never did get it out.

I eventually sold it to two guys from Imperial Beach, for a pittance.

Story of my life!

Too Wierd

2007-08-27T19:18:00.000-07:00

I don't like to post stuff I've seen on Fark, 'cause, you should be there yourself, lazy!

But I can't resist this.

Wedding Dress Weirdness --

Trash The Dress

Brides Buy TWO Dresses

My wedding, as it were, cost, maybe, 50 bucks. But I'm known for being exceptionally frugal (read-CHEAP!).

How much did YOU spend? Did you get two dresses? Did you BURN them afterwards. And, if not, what DID you do with that white dress?

Lighter Than Air

2007-08-20T20:12:00.000-07:00

I like blimps. In lieu of security cameras, I'd like to have a radio-controlled blimp with a video link to see just WHAT those people way over in the hidden corner of the library are up to...

This guy doesn't like them so much, anymore...

Book Review

2007-08-15T16:35:00.000-07:00

This isn't really a review, as I don't know how to write one. But this book irritated me enough that I wanted to bring up a few points. The book is The Grays by Whitley Strieber.

First of all, it's a novel about UFOs. If you believe, you will probably like it. I don't.

pg. 42 Refers to an "HO-grade" model train set. What is that? In my 47 years in the hobby, I've only heard it referred to as HO scale or HO gauge. I felt a little sick at this point.

pg. 45 Not a problem here, the book says Conner is 11 years old. A couple of people on Amazon.com said at the end of book, a few days later, Conner is 13. I couldn't find any mention of that.

pg. 162 "An Air Police captain"... According to my research, U.S. Air Force security forces haven't been called Air Police since the 60s. They were called Security Police back in the 70s when I was in the war. As it were.

pg. 163 An Air Force general calls a female Air Force colonel "girlie", and refers to her boobs. Well, I was not an officer, but I'm not believing THAT scene!

pg. 216 A "transmitter" from Radio Shack has "a far greater power output" by bypassing a couple of resisters. I'm not electronic expert, but I'm thinking ... not. I have READ that one can shift the frequency on certain synthesized radios by snipping a resister or so. What kind of transmitter does Radio Shack sell? Citizen's Band? 5 watts? 27 mhz? Why not buy an amateur radio transmitter and apple fryer and pump out a thousand or more watts, no bypassing needed, at 28 mhz? Ten meters rules!

pg. 245 Sounds like a Dyson sphere, to me. Why not just say so? Too technical for the intended audience?

(Foxfire CRASHES! Thank goodness for auto-save!)

pg. 286 Roumania. Maybe it's spelled like that in Romania (or not), but this book is in English, and that is a very odd spelling, to my thinking.

pg. 291 "Super-secure sideband" communications system. Try digital. Frequency-hopping. But what do I know? If you want to sound like a duck, go with sideband.

pg. 292 Enter the secret code, "...then one-niner one in six three three eight nanosecond timed sequence." I don't know about you, but I don't think my reaction time is QUITE that fast.

pg. 298 Just a typo, not worth mentioning.

pg. 300 The building is exploding, and yet the infallible power source for the transmitter keeps on going.

pg. 301 What is the portent of "the lonely way"? I don't get it, and it's not mentioned again. Maybe in the sequel?

pg. 303 How many people were "modified" by Wilkes? I thought it was mostly kids, and only around ten or less. Sounds like the whole town is running amuck!

pg. 305 Someone "far down the road" is standing on a car, shooting at him. Why stand on a car? Isn't that dangerous? They need a truck bed to stand on!!

pg. 311 Washington Monument collapses, weak marble is blamed. Well, it's granite on the inside. But I don't doubt it would have collapsed in a 7.3 earthquake.

pg. 313 The antenna is gone from the miracle transmitter, but the affected citizens still run amuck (I like that word!). Even AFTER the transmitter is destroyed the affected citizens are still bent on their killer obsession. Except when they FINALLY come to their senses. But then we've got the killer modified dog, which the author has pointed will stay affected even AFTER the radio is silenced. In animals, the radio only turns them ON, not OFF. Ok dokay there, hoss.

Well, I suppose if one believes in any sort of "religion", one might be attracted to its fictional representation by one of its adherents.

But, I'm not.

Food

2007-08-10T13:37:00.000-07:00

Ran across these food pics on the blog Axis Of Aevil. I'm hungry now!

How did I "run" across this? I was looking for antique cocoa advertisements, spurred by my reading of "Three Men On The Bummel"

No, I did not find a suitable advertisement.

Shark Attack!

2007-07-28T08:55:00.000-07:00

I hear tell there is a great white shark off the coast of Great Britain.

The Sun, a newspaper renown for its veracity, has an article (with pics!), with a sidebar by James Orr of useful tips on avoiding shark attack.

Here be a couple of them:

"NEVER urinate in your wetsuit or the ocean — sharks can detect it from five miles away and will think you’re a fish in distress, a ready-made meal."

"DON’T clap your hands and bark like a seal. Great Whites often attack humans after mistaking them for their favourite meal."

Go read the article:

And remember, don't bark like a seal, kids...

Just Testin' Something Here

2007-07-27T21:03:00.000-07:00

Just ignore this.

Cutty Sark test

Now this:

Ok, I think I see. I can see the big images on zooomr, but YOU can't. I CAN post a link to the big image, or I COULD copy and paste the html code from zooomr. Huh.

Interestingly, the giant image is all there in the blog preview, but in the actual post it is cut off.

Whoops, just noticed, when I log off zooomr I CAN'T get to the big image through the link!!

But the html code cut and past still is ok. I guess you would see the whole picture if it was like, man, in a regular ol' web page or somethin'.

Out and About

2007-07-22T10:11:00.001-07:00

I ran over to the store yesterday. Well, FIRST I went to the library and checked out some reading material. The second book of the Gregor The Overlander series, and a Harlan Corben book, as I heard him on the radio the other day. There were a lot of books in the freebie bins, and I picked out a Theodore Sturgeon title I don't remember reading, and I'm too lazy to go see what it is right now.

Then I went to the store.

Got my stuff. Hauled it out to the vehicle in a shopping cart.

Now, you know me, I have two store "habits":

I park as far away from the store as possible.
I take a cart from near where I parked when I go INTO the store, and that balances the cart I leave there. At the cart corral, I mean!

But I digress...

I saw a lady with a full arm cast having some trouble with her cart, but I didn't offer to help her. But I DID think about it! I followed her as she left the parking lot in her Jeep Cherokee. She was having trouble turning the steering wheel, what with the cast.

And her cigarette.

Yes, I said cigarette.

The lady with the giant cast on her arm was trying to drive while smoking!

Idiot.

Sunday Morning

2007-07-08T09:13:00.000-07:00

Junk science? Sounds like it to me!

"If the mother is eating Cheetos and white bread, the fetus will be born with those taste buds. If the mother is eating carrots and oatmeal, the child will be born with those taste buds," said Robert Trevino at the Social and Health Research Center in San Antonio, Texas.

from Children hear carrots, but buy Cheetos

I checked out their website (that is, the Social and Health Research Center), they seem to be doing good work, but that quote sure seems weird!

Of course, you will want to read the Fark! comments thread on this article.

Sad Note

2007-07-05T10:17:00.000-07:00

I watched a show about the Grand Canyon last night. It's been a fantasy of mine to hike it. I looked up the depth, it's about FOUR ascents (is that up and back?) of Cowles Mountain, near as I can figure.

Anyway, I looked up Colin Fletcher, to see what he was up to, and found out he died last month, that would be June, 2007.

I read Mr. Fletcher's book The Complete Walker about a zillion times. It was very inspiring, although I never actually WENT camping, for various reasons. I loved to read his opinions on equipment and philosophy of hiking. I also read The Thousand Mile Summer (hiking the length of California) and The Man Who Walked Through Time (hiking the length of the Grand Canyon).

(Gee, I just killed this post by closing the tab accidentally, thank goodness for Blogspot autosave!!)

TPS Reports

2007-06-29T14:45:00.000-07:00

Turned the boss boss on to the movie "Office Space".

I wonder how that will turn out...

---------------------------

Initialism Of The Day -- TLP (transient lunar phenomena)

Learn more in the article "Ghostly Moon events continue to mystify"

Wierd Drivers

2007-06-27T19:24:00.000-07:00

On Lake Murray Blvd. I saw a white truck follow this bizarre course.

Notice he is proceeding through the wrong turn lane, waits for traffic to pass, then drives OVER THE CURBS to get to the side street.

Wierd, just weird.

Larn Sumtin Evary Day!

2007-06-24T09:46:00.000-07:00

I just learned (in a Fark.com thread, of all places!), that "facetious" has all the vowels, in order.

Isn't that interesting?

TV Or Not TV

2007-06-23T17:38:00.000-07:00

I'm listening to the theme song from the Australian Broadcasting Corporation television series "Seachange" right now. I didn't like this series when it started, but it totally grew on me. And the song was totally earworming!!

If you want to read about the series visit this page.

The theme song (what I'm listening to) can be listened to, or downloaded, on the Episodes page. The opening theme can be played or downloaded on the Cast page.